‘Right, Laila. Maybe she and Laila can talk; she could give her some advice. Jade has so many followers, I’m sureshe’s seen her share of hate comments online.’
‘You think she’d be OK helping someone from the opposing team?’ Maya asks.
‘I guess we’ll find out. I’ll talk to her.’
‘Thanks.’ Maya smiles, before slowly standing up. ‘I should probably get back to my parents.’
Maya heads off and, in a few minutes, Ma comes back, looking happier than I’ve seen her in a long time. The two of us order, and as we chat and eat our dinner, I occasionally look over at Maya, noticing her looking at me too. The two of us had a normal conversation – one that wasn’t about our past and didn’t erupt into an argument.
Maybe it will be OK to have Maya around here again.
Chapter 17
Maya
Fourteen days to the match
Nadine is already sitting at a table in the restaurant when I arrive. She waves me over and I nod to her when the waiter asks me if I have a reservation, before making my way to her. She looks different from when we were younger – way, way different. Her hair, which used to be dyed a different colour every couple of months, is back to her natural shade – a deep chestnut colour. There are bags under her eyes and smile lines around her mouth. Back in school she used to experiment with all kinds of make-up, but she seems to have foregone most of that now.
‘Hey!’ Nadine jumps to a stand as soon as I’m in front of her, wrapping her arms around me. At least she still seems to have her fervour.
I hug her back and when we pull away from each other, I take the seat opposite her. She smiles, seemingly studying me in the same way I’ve been studying her. She doesn’t say anything, though, and I wonder what she thinks about the ways I’ve changed and the ways that I haven’t.
Ever since the dawat at Isra Auntie’s house, I’ve decided to try to reconnect with old friends again. Despite feeling overwhelmed at seeing so many people and being accosted with so many questions, it also feels like the first step toreally figuring out my life again. Because it has to be more than quiet dinners with my parents and coaching the girls on my football team. Nadine has been the only one who’s managed to find some time in her busy schedule to suggest a meet-up, and I jumped at the chance. After all, we were best friends once. For a long time. Even if we lost touch when I moved to America.
‘So … what have you been up to?’ Nadine finally asks.
The question feels elusive. How do you condense nine years of life into a single conversation?
‘Oh, you know,’ I say. ‘Just … this and that. Playing football and then not playing football. And now I’m coaching a team for the school. Ms Jacobs asked me to.’
Nadine’s eyebrows shoot up. ‘You’ve seen Ms Jacobs? Recently?’
‘She basically forced me to give an impromptu speech to the entire school, and then asked me if I’d coach the school team for the summer.’
Nadine’s eyes widen, and she lets out a quick, short burst of laughter, which makes me grin. ‘Ms Jacobs was always a character, wasn’t she?’
‘I guess she was.’ I’d forgotten how Nadine, Gwen and I used to roll our eyes at Ms Jacobs’ antics sometimes. How she’d try to mimic any slang that we used to say at the time and act like she was in the know. She definitely seems a lot more comfortable with herself now.
‘It must have been weird being back in school,’ Nadine says.
‘That’s one way to put it.’ I shrug. ‘What about you, though? What have you been up to? I can’t believe it’s been so many years since we last saw each other.’
‘You’re the one who jetted off to America,’ Nadine says,teasingly. She doesn’t sound bitter about it, the way Dina did a few days ago. At first, Nadine and I had tried to keep in contact, but it was difficult with the time difference. It didn’t help that, in the beginning, I felt so overwhelmed with everything, and I was still reeling from what had happened with Dina, that the thought of staying in touch with anyone felt painful. It wasn’t long before our messages had trickled down to a few times a year, for birthdays or special occasions. And then complete silence.
‘Well, yeah, but I’m back now and I want to know everything that’s been going on with you.’
‘Nothing too exciting.’ Nadine shrugs. ‘I mean, no jet-setting around the world, or becoming kind of a celebrity.’ She gives me a smile. ‘I went to university for a while, did a bullshit business degree that didn’t take me anywhere. I hated every job that I had afterwards, and I’m actually doing a nursing degree now.’
Nadine and I used to stress out about what we even wanted to do with our lives after school. I’d never seriously considered football, it always felt like too much of a risk. I used to say that maybe I’d study medicine, or engineering. The kind of fields that I felt my parents might be able to brag to aunties and uncles about. Nadine used to float around between different things she wanted to study; one day it was psychology, the next computer science. I vaguely remember when she’d finally applied and got her offers. Even vaguer are the memories of when she started university; she’d text me about her classes, lecturers, the people she met. I was too busy with my own life to pay too much attention to what was going on with her. I’m sure she was just as overwhelmed as I was.
‘Do you like nursing?’ I ask.
‘Yeah.’ Nadine smiles, and it makes her eyes light up. ‘My aunt got sick a couple of years back and I got to see how hard the nurses worked. It made me appreciate it and helped me realise that I wanted to do something like that with my life, instead of working for some firm that’s pretty much destroying the world.’
She sounds so sure of who she is now, so proud of her work. I’m happy for her, but there’s this quiet whisper of envy inside me too. I want to feel like Nadine does: happy with where I am, satisfied in my career. Instead, I still feel unmoored and unsure. After my summer of coaching, who knows what I’ll do? Maybe I’ll be back to moping around my bedroom, feeling sorry for myself.
‘I’m really glad that you found something that you love,’ I say.
