I shake my head. ‘No way. We’re not dragging her into this. She didn’t even want this match to happen. Besides,Jade’s not hurting anyone with her posts, she’s just hyping people up.’
Maya’s frown just deepens with every word I say. I try to meet her halfway.
‘I’m not happy about the attention either,’ I say. ‘Clearly. But … it is what it is.’
Maya takes hold of her cup of coffee, lifting it to her lips and taking a long sip, before putting it down on the table between us with a little more oomph than necessary. Some of the coffee spills over from the cup, sliding down the edges and onto the saucer under the cup.
‘I think we should call off the match,’ Maya says. I have thought about calling off the match too, but I can’t admit that to Maya. I don’t think the Divas would take it very well, either.
‘I don’t know …’
‘Do you really want your team’s loss to be announced in the local papers, to be seen by everyone?’ Maya asks.
It’s my turn to frown as I turn over what she’s said in my head.
Ourloss.
Not hers.
‘Are you serious?’ I ask, settling her with a glare.
Her eyes flicker up to mine, and I can see the glint of realisation about what she’s said dawn on her. She said it so inconsequentially – like there is no other outcome that she can even imagine.
‘I didn’t mean—’
‘Clearly you did,’ I huff. ‘Look, we’renotcalling off the match, because your team are the ones who bullied mine, and my team deserve a chance to prove that they’re good. I’m sorry if the great Maya Alam is afraid of losingface in front of an audience, because I’mnot.’
Maya sighs again, and leans back in her seat, looking at me. She doesn’t even try to defend herself.
‘Are we going to talk about the other night, or just fall back into old patterns?’ she asks coolly.
My stomach drops, but I try not to let it show that she’s fazed me with the sudden subject change. ‘I don’t know what that has to do with anything.’
‘Isn’t it the whole reason why we’re doing this? Our teams are caught up in our feud?’
‘We don’t have a feud,’ I say firmly.
Maya just continues to stare me down, but I don’t cave in. I’m definitely not going to admit that I’ve thought about her every day for the past nine years, that I’ve obsessed over her career and our past, and everything that we had and everything that we don’t have anymore. I was already too vulnerable with her the other night, after working to build up my walls for years and years on end. I’m not ready for Maya to hurt me again. For anything to hurt me again.
After what feels like an eternity, Maya looks away from me and shakes her head, like she’s disappointed in my response. ‘You know, the other night, I was happy for a second,’ she says. ‘I thought that maybe things could be good between us again, but I should have known that it was just some kind of a blip. Things with you are always like that.’
I frown. ‘What the hell is that supposed to mean?’
‘It means that this is how it always is with you. As soon as things get complicated, that’s the end for you. That’s what it was like last time. You broke my heart, and I won’t forget that.’
My eyes widen at her insinuations – that I’m somehow the problem, was ever the problem in our relationship.‘I brokeyourheart? What about you? You betrayed me, you took my spot, you tookmydream. And then you just left. For nine years. You can’t just … revise history.’
‘I played a match, I was given an opportunity,’ Maya says. ‘And I took it. You could have still had your dream, we could have still been together. We could have had the life that we talked about. You were the one that gave up. You sabotaged yourself.’
Maya says all of this so calmly, like she’s reciting some history book, instead of sharing a twisted version of what really happened. I can’t believe that after so many years there’s not a hint of remorse from Maya. A thread of anger makes its way through me, boiling in my blood and making my face burn up.
‘I can’t believe this is the bullshit you tell yourself to make yourself feel better,’ I manage to spit out.
Maya holds my gaze for a moment, before swiftly standing up. ‘I’ll see you at the match, Dina.’
With that, she turns around and walks out of the door, disappearing from sight. I can only watch after her, my rage almost spilling out of me.
I stomp my way to the restaurant, my head still spinning with all of the things that Maya said. I have half a mind to storm after her, to say my piece. But I don’t even know what I would say since my head has been a slew of angry gibberish.
