‘Dina, you don’t—’
But clearly, Dina isn’t done speaking because she continues. ‘All these years, I thought that I hated you for what you did, but, honestly, I never hated you. I missed you every day that you were gone. I’ve missed you since the second that Jen told me that you were offered the position in America, because I knew you would go. It was easier to blame you for things that were out of your control, and it was easier to tell myself and everyone around me that I hated you than to admit how much I missed you.’
There are tears swimming in her eyes now, and she blinks them away. I feel the pinprick of tears behind my eyes too, because in the past nine years, this conversation is all I’ve ever wanted to have with Dina. A conversation that explained why she broke my heart in the way that she did. One where she said that she missed me, and meant it. And I can tell that she means it.
‘I missed you too,’ I say, though my throat feels thick with tears. ‘I missed you every day that I was gone. I wanted to call you so many times. The first time I met my coach, first time I went to practice, first time I played a match, the only person I wanted to talk to was you, but then … I remembered. We weren’t together anymore.’
Dina reaches her hand out, linking our fingers together. The warmth of her sends a tingle all through me. I’ve missed her touch, her scent, her everything. I don’t always admit that to myself, but now how much I’ve missed her overwhelms me, floods me.
‘You were right, all the things you said about me. I blamed you because it was easier. And I missed out on so much because of that,’ Dina says.
‘You could still … I mean, you could still try for a career in football if you wanted. It’s not too late,’ I say.
But Dina just shakes her head. ‘No, what I mean is, I missed out on us.’
In all the time that I’ve known Dina, I don’t think I’ve ever seen her emanate this kind of sincerity. I certainly have never seen her put anything over her love of football. I almost wouldn’t believe it, if she wasn’t looking at me like that; as if I am the only person in her world. And I wish that I was.
‘I know it’s not as easy as saying sorry and pretending that everything that happened didn’t happen. I know I broke your heart. And if you never forgave me, or trusted me, I would understand that. But …’ And here Dina takes a deep breath, and I can feel her hands trembling. I squeeze them, and she cracks a small smile; one that brightens her entire face. ‘Can you give me another chance? Can we reset the score between us?’
For a moment, I flash back to nine years ago. The last time Dina showed up at my house unprompted. I still remember the look in her eyes then, the venom in them. The last words that she said to me. But I look at Dina now, and there’s nothing of that here. In nine years, the two of us have changed in infinite ways. And I’m ready to know this Dina. Now.
‘Yes,’ I say, my voice coming out breathless. ‘Yes, I can give you another chance. Yes, we can—’
But I don’t even get to finish my sentence before Dina is leaning forward and closing the gap between us. Her lips are on mine, her fingers in my hair, caressing my cheeks. I lean into her too, encircling her waist with my hands and pulling her closer. The scent of her fills me up; the feel of her hands on my skin sends goosebumps up my entire body.
When we pull apart from the kiss, there’s still little space left between us. Dina rests her forehead against me, her skin warm on mine.
‘Please tell me your parents aren’t home,’ she says.
‘They aren’t,’ I say, and Dina kisses me again, her lips quirking up into a smile against my mouth. I feel like we’re teenagers again, sneaking around behind our parents’ backs. In those days, we were so scared of how we felt. Our every touch, every kiss, felt tentative yet filled with possibility. But here, right now, with Dina and I together, it feels like those possibilities have finally been realised. Like all our time apart, our heartbreak, everything, has led up to this moment.
I stand up, linking my hands with Dina’s and pulling her up with me. We’re still tangled in each other as I lead her up the stairs, all the way into my bedroom. This time, there will be no interruptions.
Chapter 37
Dina
One Year Later
‘Come on, Sophie, you got this!’ I shout, clapping my hands together encouragingly as she races towards the goal. Her face is serious, sweat dripping down her forehead. She kicks the ball, nearly falling in the process. But it’s worth it because the ball hits the net, missing Julia in goal by a couple of inches.
I let out a loud cheer and clap my hands together as Sophie pumps her fists happily.
Glancing at my watch, I realise that we’re already almost ten minutes over our practice time.
‘OK, let’s wrap up for today,’ I say. ‘And please, get plenty of sleep before the match next week.’
Jade rolls her eyes as she moves past me. ‘You don’t have to remind us of that before every single match.’
‘But this is a special one,’ I say.
‘Don’t worry, we are definitely going to beat Westbrook this time,’ Sara says a little too confidently. The Divas have won quite a few games since our loss last year, but Westbrook still have a better track record than us and a pretty great coach.
‘Just don’t get too hung up on winning. Remember, it’s just as important—’
‘To have fun, weknow,’ Jade groans to the rest of the team. They make fun of me, but I know they do it with fondness. ‘Can we go now?’
‘Go ahead.’
