Butter sizzlesin the skillet as I turn the first grilled cheese over and then the second, the bread golden brown and nearly done. It’s the most perfect kind of night—not just the intimacy but how completelynormalthis feels as Tanner talks animatedly about what’s happening at Vetted Paws and the plans he and Sorren have for the future.
“Cal brings the boys cross-country team to Vetted Paws a couple of times a week, and they take some of the dogs on their morning run. The kids love it and so do the dogs. It helps them socialize and get exposure. We’ve had a ton of adoptions that way too.”
Tanner smiles as he sits on the stool by the island, subtly shifting every once in a while, no doubt sore after his first time. But I made sure to take care of him in the shower, soaping him up and massaging his scalp before getting us both off in between messy kisses and wandering hands.
His first time.
A rush of emotion slams me in the chest like it does every time I’ve stopped to think about it. When I was younger, sex had meaning but it was still just sex—the emotional ties were far less than they are with Tanner.
Maybe it’s because we’re older, or maybe it’s because he was closeted while married to a woman before me. Either way, I’m a lucky bastard for being able to share this with him.
“I’ve read the articles Arden wrote about it and just for the record, you look sexy as hell in those company polo shirts,” I tell him over my shoulder, a blush creeping up his neck as I wink.
“Sorren makes me do all the press stuff,” he groans as I flip the stove off and plate our sandwiches. “He hates the spotlight, so unless it’s absolutely necessary, that falls on me.”
“But you don’tjustdo interviews,” I prompt, taking a bite and immediately regretting not letting it cool down as cheese the temperature of lava hits my tongue.
Dammit.
Tanner snickers and shakes his head, twisting off the stool and making his way to the fridge. “Briggs does the same thing.” He smirks, handing me a bottle of water before returning to the island.
“You tired me out. And I figure I have to get you off at least once more before we go back to bed.”
“You’re ridiculous.”
“That’s not what you were saying when I was balls deep inside you.”
Tanner’s face flames, the bottle of water in his hand halfway to his mouth as he gapes at me. “I can’t believe you just said that.”
“It’s true,” I reply, lifting one shoulder and letting it drop as I round the counter and stand between his legs. Tilting his face back to look at me, I grip his chin and dip my head until we’re eye to eye. “And I’m real fucking excited to do it again.”
Instead of letting him answer, I take his mouth in a hard kiss, my tongue sweeping languidly against his until he’s whimpering and trying to pull me closer.
“Fine,” Tanner pants, “but less frat boy next time.”
“I’ll make love to you, Sweetheart, if that’s what you want.”
“It’s the words,” he groans. It’s exasperated instead of sexy, but I like that too. I like seein’ him all riled up and turned on even when he’s not quite sure he should be.
“We’ll work on it then.” Pecking another quick kiss to his lips, I return to my now moderately warm sandwich and take a bite.“But for now, eat up because I have a kitchen to remodel in the morning and I need something to think about while I’m ripping out cabinets.”
“Sounds hot.”
“You wanna come watch? I’ve never been into role play, but I think I can make an exception if that’s what you’re into.”
“Not right now,”—he pauses thoughtfully—“but it’s not off the table.”
“Good to know.”
Really good to know.
39
TANNER
Journal Entry #544
I went all the way with Deacon and he told me he loves me. And then I told him I love him too. Even writing that, I can’t keep the smile from my face. I never thought I’d get here, but maybe it was that I was never supposed to get here with anyone else.
