“I assume there is something wrong with me, as well,” Farr’vye said, amused.
“Should we get Jaeyoung to diagnose us?” I joked.
A breathy laugh escaped through Farr’vye’s rows of teeth. “I do not see the point. But you are a linguist, yes? You enjoy labels?”
I thought about it for a while. My mind was quiet while Farr’vye held me, empty of its usual racing anxious thoughts. It was nice.
“No,” I decided. “I don’t want a label for whatever we are.”
“I agree.”
Farr’vye was about to lean in.
“But…”
He paused. “But?”
I licked my dry lips. “Um…” Doubt crashed in, and I shook my head. “No, never mind.”
Farr’vye’s thumbs dug gently into my cheeks as he forced me to look at him.
“Tell me,” he demanded.
Fuck, why did it feel so good when he ordered me around?
“It’s stupid,” I mumbled.
Farr’vye narrowed his eyes into fiery slits. The implication was clear enough: Don’t make him say it again.
Ignoring the thrill that swirled in my belly, I said, “Um… I dunno. I thought it would be nice to be your…” I cleared my throat. “Your filum.”
It was awkward saying it out loud. Being the recipient of Farr’vye’s attention should’ve made me happy enough. Why did I need to push my luck? What if Iwasn’this filum, and I made a total ass out of myself? Would it change how he felt about me?
“You know what? I changed my mind—”
But Farr’vye’s nictitating membrane had already slid over his eyes.
Dread fell over me. I stood still.
What if he saw nothing? What if we were incompatible?
I trembled as anxiety gripped me. But Farr’vye was gripping me, too, and his influence over me was stronger. As soon as he felt my body shaking, he held me closer, his fingers digging deeper into my skin. It was firm but not painful. Grounding. I relaxed as much as I was able to while unknowns still hung in the air.
The third translucent eyelid slipped away, and his eyes became bright and vivid again.
“Would you like to know?” Farr’vye asked.
My stomach twisted into more knots than a pretzel.
“Yes. No. Maybe. Yes,” I blurted. “Hurry and tell me before I change my mind—”
“You are.”
My heart skipped a beat. I was dazed for a second as the information sank in.
“You’re not lying to make me feel better, are you?” I asked weakly.
Farr’vye’s stare didn’t falter. “I promised I would never lie to you, did I not?”
