His words today reminded me how he feels.
Go on.Tell them.Tell them how you failed as a wife.I’ll wait.
His laughter plays in my head like a stuck record, even now as I turn onto my side and scrunch the pillow under my head.
When Zander said he wanted to talk, I told him I needed to go home.
“Courtney.”He placed his hand on the arm of the chair.
“I’m sorry, I need to get out of here.If you don’t want to represent me anymore, I understand.”I stood, pushing the chair back and reaching for my purse.
“Wait,” Zander said firmly, standing with me.
When I lifted my face to his and our eyes connected, I was hit with all his emotions.
All of them.
I felt his fear, his affection, his concern, and his suspicions.Any trust that we had built was gone.
“We will disprove this,” he pointed to the photo.“If you can assure me that it’s not real.”
See.He’s questioning everything I told him.
“It’s fake.”
“Good,” Zander nodded, but I could still see doubt.“Then that leaves one other business matter.Tell me what he meant by you failing him as a wife.”
No.
“Just that.”I glanced out toward the skyline of Manhattan, wishing I were anywhere but here.I stupidly slept with him.My attorney.Now there is an intimacy between us that makes me feel even more vulnerable.
“That’s not an answer.Why does he think you failed him, Courtney?”
“I am not talking about this.”I hugged my purse.“I need to go.”
I walk around the chair, but he stepped in front of me.
“Please, Zander.”I shook my head and finally glanced up.“Look, I know you are angry with me, and I deserve it.I’ll take the morning-after pill.”
“Explain how you could forget something so important?”he demanded, distrust and judgment clear as day in those blue eyes of his.
Because it’s not important.
I’m infertile.
It’s a hard pill to swallow—pun not intended—but after being subjected to my husband’s cruelty and humiliation in front of both sets of lawyers, I wasn’t going to launch into a discussion about my body.
We fucked.
He doesn’t deserve to know my medical history.One I’m highly ashamed of.
“There is a lot going on.I am stressed.Trust me, it won’t be a problem.”
Zander drew a deep breath as he planted his hands on his hips.Taking a moment to glance around the room, his eyes finally landed on mine.And they were clear.
“I’ve severely violated my professional ethics by sleeping with you.It was wrong.This ends between us now.You need to do a pregnancy test so we can put it behind us.”
Every flicker of affection that existed between us died in that moment.Like a flame being extinguished rapidly.
