“Yeah.Don’t mention it.”
“She’s back on the right track, Marcus.Let’s give her the benefit of the doubt.”
That doesn’t mean she won’t derail again.“Will do, ma’am.”
She hung up, and Marcus sighed and looked up at the sky.It was lunchtime now, and the sky was as bright as it was gonna get, which was a washed-out blue that looked like a pair of jeans run through the laundry machine about a thousand times.
“So we’ve got apathetic local judges and officers on one hand and overprotective federal supervisors on the other.We’ve got the mad priest slinking around looking for who else he may devour, and our two heroes caught in the middle digging for scraps and trying to figure out what they might mean.Just another day in the life.”
His phone buzzed, and when he saw Cheryl’s name on the caller ID, his head dropped to his chest.“Day just keeps getting worse.”
He answered and said, "Can this wait?I'm in the middle of a case."
“I just wanted to tell you that I’ve agreed to drop the alimony claim.I’ve been thinking it over, and I’ve decided a clean break is the best thing for me.My counsel is pitching a fit about it, but I’m going to overrule him.I’ll switch my health insurance to my company’s plan.We can sign the paperwork remotely and… that’ll be that.”
Marcus blinked.“Oh.All right.”
“Is that okay?”
“Sure.Why wouldn’t it be?”
“You sound disappointed.”
Marcus couldn’t tell if Cheryl was disappointed by that or if she was gloating.“No, I’m… I think you’re right.I think a clean break is best for both of us.”
“Okay.Good.I’ll push it through on my end, and then we can pursue happiness apart from each other.”
“Yeah.Look, Cheryl…”
His voice trailed off.After several seconds, she prompted, “Yes?”
“I…” He sighed.“I didn’t mean for things to end this way.”
Now it was Cheryl’s turn to fall silent.Marcus bit his lip, waiting for her to answer, wondering why he still cared what her answer would be.He wasn’t in love with her anymore.Why was it so hard for him to let go?
Because it’s a failure.A permanent one.You tried to be married to a woman you loved, and you failed.Just like you did with Kate.
“It’s a little late to say that, isn’t it, Marcus?”
There was no anger in Cheryl’s voice, just a resigned exasperation.The love they’d once shared was in Cheryl’s past where it belonged.Marcus should take his cue from her and leave it in his past too.
But if he couldn’t make that marriage work, then how could he make a future with Kate work?He loved her too, or at least he wanted to love her.If he could just get past whatever damned hurdles kept him from making smart choices around the women he wanted, then he could love them and they could love him, and everything could be beautiful, the way it was supposed to be.
But he couldn’t seem to get it right.No matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t seem to get his ducks lined up.Couldn’t make his marriage to Cheryl work, couldn’t make his relationship to Kate work, couldn’t find Cox and keep him from killing people with impunity.All just wasted effort.
That was going to be etched on his tombstone.Marcus Reid: tried hard, still failed.
“Goodbye, Marcus.I wish you happiness.”
Marcus heaved a sigh.“Yeah.You too.”
Cheryl hung up.Marcus put his phone in his pocket and stood where he was, coping with the final punctuation of that particular failure.
He looked back up at the sky.The blue had brightened to an almost cartoonish shade.The breeze tickled his face with an almost liquid caress, flowing through his stubble and sending tingles down his spine and through his extremities.
He pulled his phone from his pocket and sent Kate another text:Waiting for court order for juvenile record.
He sent that text and typed another one.Cheryl backed off of the alimony request.She’s going to finalize the divorce.
