“No,” he agreed.“Just some fresh air to suck in while I scream into the void.”
That brought a somewhat longer-lasting smile and an almost genuine laugh.“Yeah.Sure feels like that, doesn’t it?How’s Cheryl?”
The last question caught Marcus off guard.He stared at her, and she shrugged but didn’t turn her gaze away and didn’t say anything else.
“Uh, she’s good,” he replied.“I guess.She’s not coming after alimony anymore.She’s going to sign the divorce papers.Which are just waiting on my signature now, which my attorney will receive as soon as we’re finished with this.”
“That’s good,” Kate said.
“Yeah.”
They fell silent again.Kate didn't take her eyes off Marcus.He shuffled his feet after a moment and said, "Kate, I want to be more than your friend."
Kate sighed."Marcus, now's not."
“I get it,” he interrupted.“Just let me finish what I have to say.I want to be more than your friend.I have failed badly at making that happen.”
Compassion came to Kate’s eyes.“You didn’t fail, Marcus.It just didn’t work out.”
“It didn’t work out because I was dragging my feet with Cheryl.I was dragging my feet because… Because I hated that I’d failed at that too.”
Her eyes hardened a little.“So you want to be more than my friend, but you don’t want your marriage to fail.”
“My marriage failed before I started dating you.I didn’t have the courage to accept that I could try hard at something and not succeed.”
“But you didn’treallytry hard to makeuswork, did you?”
She delivered that without anger, or withoutmuchanger, but it cut Marcus to the bone anyway.Mostly because it was true.
“No, I didn’t.And I will always regret that.But I’m not going to dance around this anymore.I like you.Hell, I…” He hesitated but only for a moment.“I could fall in love with you as easily as I could put on an old boot.”
She raised an eyebrow.“Thank you, I think?”
Marcus chuckled.“My point is that… I understand that the best I can hope for right now is to get along with my partner.Maybe soon, we can be friends again.And maybe, somewhere in the distant future, we can be more than friends.That’swhat I want.That distant future.Hopefully not too distant.”
He paused a moment, allowing the thought to percolate in both of their minds.Kate regarded him, her expression waffling between frustration, exhaustion, and maybe, just maybe, a little bit of hope.
When she finally spoke, she kept that hope well-hidden, but she didn’t slam the door in his face either.“I would love to be you friend again.I miss that.I miss that we could talk and not worry about what we said or what the other person was going to say.As for the rest?I think we should just focus on being friends right now.Let the future take care of itself.”
Marcus nodded.“Okay.I can do that.”
Kate smiled.A real smile.It looked good on her.“If I hug you, do you promise not to try to kiss me?”
Marcus laughed.“Sure.This one time.I can’t make any promises about tomorrow, though.”
“We’ll let tomorrow figure itself out.”
She pulled him into an embrace, and the cold in Marcus’s veins retreated.He held her for a long while, and when he separated, some color remained in Kate’s cheeks.That looked good too.
“Why don’t we take another look at the evidence?”he suggested.“I’m not getting any sleep tonight, and you don’t look in a sleep mood either.I’ll brew us some coffee while you get everything set up, and we’ll have an old-fashioned brainstorming session.”
Kate nodded.“All right.”
She was smiling, but now that their focus was back on the case, anxiety had crept into her expression too.“We’ll get him, Kate.We’ll put an end to this, all of it.I promise.”
Kate took a deep breath."I wonder how much longer we'll keep believing that."
She pushed off from the wall and headed inside.Marcus remained where he was for a moment longer.A snowflake singed the back of his neck as it melted.The water rolled down to his collar and soaked into the cotton.
