What more could I want? I know he’s in love with her.
Hell, he worships the ground she walks on, and it shows.
When Silas starts asking JJ questions, I zone out for my sanity and let my eyes wander around the cafeteria. Wishing to get a glimpse of long dark hair and beautiful brown eyes, yet I’m left with a weeping heart.
It’s probably for the best.No, it’s definitely for the best.
Although I can’t help but wonder if she’s okay…all my messages have gone unanswered. Mostly from this summer, while I was off my face and feeling soppy.
And fuck, it hurts. It hurts so badly, it feels like my chest has been ripped open. I’m just good at hiding it, even if my therapist said I should express my true emotions to those I trust.
When I glance over at the entrance, the hairs on my arms begin to stand when I spot Maya’s two closest friends, Jade and Alice. I brace myself, expecting Maya to walk in next, but she doesn’t.
I frown, fingers itching to know where she is and why she’s not come back for her third year. Panic stretches through me when I think back to the morning after I got so drunk I couldn’t remember what happened the night before. That’s when she screamed at me to leave her alone and never contact her again.
It shattered me to pieces knowing I could hurt her the way I did, and how out of control my drinking was, and I’m done making people upset. And god, a part of me doesn’t want to know, but another part of me is desperate to.
Stay away, Finn.
She’s better off without you.
Leave her alone.
But none of my thoughts help when I find myself standing up.
Silas and JJ glance at me, but my eyes are locked on Jade and Alice. “Where are you going?” Silas asks.
“I’ll be back in a moment.”
JJ reaches forward. “Finn, I don’t know if this is a good idea.”
I snatch my hand away from his grip and turn to look at him, heart pounding in my chest. “I’m just going to ask a question. I need to know that she’s okay.”
His face twists to a look of sympathy, then concern. “Okay…” he trails off. “But it’s probably not going to end well.”
Without another word, I turn and head towards them as they take a seat at the other end of the cafeteria. My palms begin to sweat, and my mouth turns bone dry as I approach their table, words already failing me.
Jade’s eyes find me first, and the scowl that covers her face is unfriendly, so I brace myself. Alice turns to look at me, and she flashes an exact replica of her friend’s expression.
“Hi,” I exhale as I stand at the edge of their table.
“What the hell do you want?” Alice grumbles, and I subtly flinch from the iciness of her tone.
I drag my tongue over my bottom lip before drawing in a breath. “I-I just wanted to know how Maya is doing. I haven’t seen her around campus.”
Jade snorts and shakes her head at me in what I can only assume is disbelief. “I can’t believe you have the audacity to come over here and ask about her after what you did.” Her nose turns up at me. “You were being so unsupportive, and now you want to act like you care? Bore off.”
Unsupportive?
I swipe a hand through my hair, shifting from foot to foot under their intense gazes. “I was in a bad way, okay?”
Alice grinds her teeth together. “And you think that’s an excuse?”
“No,” I rasp. “I don’t. I don’t remember much of the conversation.”
“Maya doesn’t want to see you. So get that into your head,” Jade spits.
“She’s not coming back?” I ask under a whisper.
