I inhale a shaky breath as he wraps his arms around me again, and I instantly feel at home. I don’t want him to let go. This is all I wanted, his safety.
“Thank you for coming,” I whisper. “I-I just really needed you to hold me.”
“I’ll hold you all night if you want me to.”
My eyes squeeze shut at his words.Yes. Yes. That’s all I want.
I wipe my eyes, which have started to tear up, before pulling away slowly. “Let’s go check on our girl.”
“Okay,” he says before taking my hand and walking us towards my bedroom.
We peer into Skye’s cot to find her fast asleep. Neither of us says anything, we just stare down at our beautiful creation.
“Come on.” He tilts his head. “Sleep.”
“Not sure if I can,” I say again.
“It’s okay,” he whispers. “I’ll hold you, and I’ll stay awake.”
My eyes meet his, and I frown. “You’re not tired?”
“I’ll stay awake if it makes you feel safer.”
It does, but I don’t want him to make that sacrifice for me. Sleep is sacred for parents.
“Don’t even try to fight me on this one, sunshine.” He sighs as he tugs me towards the bed. “I’ve got you. I’ll never let anything happen to you.”
The second we slip beneath the sheets, and he wraps his arms around me, I’m filled with security once more. I close my eyes as he kisses the back of my neck tenderly, and I shudder.
“This just proves another reason I need to stay sober,” he murmurs. “I need to be here at times like this, and I wouldn’t be able to do it if I was off my face. I’m trying so hard to be the man you deserve.”
My throat hurts, and I swallow back the cry that wants to burst out. “You’re already a different man,” I whisper into the darkness.
“Different?”
“Yeah,” I say as I cling to his arm that’s wrapped around my front securely.
“In what way?”
“In the best way.”
The sound of Finn releasing a ragged breath tickles the back of my neck. “I’m not going to miss out on a second of being with my family.”
My heart squeezes at being called his family, but I understand.
We are a family. A family who is trying to work through their shit.
“But you’re also doing it for yourself,” I say softly.
Finn is silent before he says, “Yeah. For my health, but also for everyone who needs me. I never want to feel like a disappointment again.”
I instinctively kiss his knuckles. “No one thinks that.”
“I was once upon a time.”
“That’s in the past, like you said, you need to keep looking forward.”
“Yeah…” He trails off. “And forward looks bright with you two right there in front of me.”
