“Don’t assume it’ll be easy,” I lecture. “Online can be harder depending on your major, and marine biology is tough, darling.”
Atlas sighs once more, this time with exasperation. “Oh well, I’ll do my best. I have no plans to be a scientist anyway; I just want to learn. Julian and I have already decided I’ll be a stay-at-home father, like Mother is.”
It suits him—wandering around a beautiful home with his children, doting on them, and greeting Julian at the door every evening. Sure, he’ll have to get used to a less expensive lifestyle, as one day, he won’t be supported by Father, and Julian isn’t a rich man, but I don’t think my brother cares.
I, on the other hand, would probably go crazy.
But having a cute husband of my own to guide and support… that doesn’t sound so bad.
Or it wouldn’t if I had anything soft left inside of me to give.
“Enjoy it,” I tell Atlas. “School is a grand time if you love what you’re learning.”
“Did you feel that way about business?” Atlas asks.
“Of course I did. You know how I feel about structure and logic, and my business degree had plenty of both.” As I speak,my brother turns to look at me again, his eyes softening as he reaches out a hand to rub gently at my wrist.
The wrist connected to the hand that is still playing with his silky hair.
Some might say my love for Atlas is too strong or too obsessive, but I disagree. When you watch someone so innocent, so pure, fall into the hands of a monster and then suffer for as long as he did… It’s hard not to latch on and never let go.
Atlas is my one soft, precious thing. The last little piece of me that is still sweet and kind, pulsing quietly in my chest.
I loathe that Julian is taking him from me, one day at a time.
“One day you’ll run Papa’s business, and you’ll have a beautiful wife just like Momma. Maybe then you’ll be happy,” he beams.
A cold chill runs through me. Not because Atlas has no idea that I also prefer the company of men—I’ve only kept my preferences to myself because it doesn’t feel necessary to divulge—but because he can so blatantly see that I am not happy.
That I’m drowning a bit more every day.
Flashes of golden hair and gentle gray eyes circle my mind, reminding me of nights nestled away in that little house and smooth skin beneath my fingertips.
Of his soft, pretty cries.
“Maybe,” I mumble, my fingers dropping away from his hair.
Before Atlas can respond, the sound of footsteps approaching surrounds us.
“Atty,” Julian calls, his voice light and full of a joy I haven’t felt in ages. “Are you still pouting?”
A grin shapes Atlas’s lips once more, and he ducks his head, fiddling with his robe. “Maybe.”
“Aw, come on, little bunny,” Julian pleads. “Don’t be mad. If it’s that important to you, tonight I’ll let you boss me around—”
“Julie!” Atlas screeches, covering his face with his hands. Julian just laughs.
I give the approaching man an unimpressed look as he takes to standing next to me, his black hair slicked back and brown eyes shining even with that jagged scar running over one.
Julian is clearly an attractive man with his large muscles and kind features, but that doesn’t make him any more appealing to me. When I see him, I still see the ignorant man who turned up on my doorstep, his eyes following my baby brother around like a hungry lion stalking a gazelle.
“Really?” I deadpan, and Julian turns his attention to me, still grinning wildly.
“What? Atlas is mad that I wouldn’t let him—”
“I forgive you!” Atlas shouts, standing from his chair to turn toward us both. “Please, for the love of all things holy, do not speak any further, Julian.”
Julian looks at Atlas as if he’s not only the sun but the sky that cradles it and the stars that hide behind its glow. As if Atlas is the beginning and end of every day, his entire world.
