“He loved Blue Jays and dogwood, huh? Sounds like you had a good man, Nan. I wish I could have met him.”
“Oh, he would have loved you. Your brothers, too. Come on inside, honey. Let me make you some sweet tea.” Nan starts heading toward the deck, and I’m not about to argue.
I look for evidence of Johnnie as we step into the trailer.
“She’s not here,” Nan says with her back to me, getting to work on the tea she promised.
“Are you a mind reader?” I laugh.
“Not a mind reader, just not stupid. I know you’re crazy about that granddaughter of mine. She took her journal and said she was walking down to the lake. She does that a lot. I don’t know what she writes in that thing, but whatever it is, I hope she keeps it up. She always comes back with more light in her eyesthan when she left. I’m sure she’ll be back soon, can’t write in the dark.”
Nan turns back around with two full glasses and sets one down in front of me, and we each take a seat on a barstool on opposite sides of the counter.
“You’re a good man, Collins. Just don’t break that girl’s heart. It’s one of the purest I’ve ever seen and it would kill me to see her hurting.”
“I have no intentions of hurting Johnnie, Nan. Quite the opposite, actually.” I take a drink of my tea and eye Nan over the rim of the coupe, just now realizing that she made us sweet tea in a margarita glass.
“Is that why you climb through her bedroom window nearly every night?”
I almost spit out my drink.
“Don’t bother trying to deny it.” She narrows her eyes, puts an elbow on the counter and points her finger. “I know you open her window in the evenings just as much as she sneaks out of it to be with you. Please just tell me you’re being careful.”
Oh, dear god, are we about to have a sex talk? Because I was not prepared for conversation to go in this direction.
“Umm…”Holy shit, I have no idea what to say.
“Don’t worry, I’m not going to run and tell her parents about the shenanigans you two have been up to this summer. Shit, I don’t even plan to tell Johnnie that I’m onto her. I was your age once, too. I want her to have fun being a teenager. What kind of grandmother would I be though, if I didn’t at least try making sure you two have your heads screwed on straight? You’re too young to be parents. I want you to enjoy life, let’s make sure nothing gets in the way of that before its time.”
“Don’t worry, Nan. Nothing like that is going on.” I can’t believe I’m saying this right now.
“Johnnie turns eighteen in a couple days. If nothing has happened yet, we both know it will. Just be smart.”
“You have my word.”
Nan reaches over and places a hand over top of mine. “You’re one of the good ones, Mr. Combs. I trust you. Let’s keep this conversation just between the two of us. Okay, sugar?”
“You’ve got it.” I smile over at the woman that owns a piece of my heart right along with her granddaughter. I’ve lost a hell of a lot recently. Having these two, though, makes the pain a little easier to bear.
The door swings open just then with Johnnie kicking off her Vans as she closes it behind her.
“You guys in here talking about me?”
Nan and I reply at the same time. “Nope.”
CHAPTER 18
collins
NOW
We’rethe only souls to be found out here on these back country roads. Or should I say just me? I’m the only one. Johnnie’s also here but lost somewhere in the depths of sleep. Good sleep too, if the deepness of her breaths are any indication.
I look over at her and fight the instinct to smile at the way her hands are clasped at her chest, her head resting against the window, knees tucked under her like she’s trying to take up less space. She reminds me of a small, worn-out kid who’s been through more than she ever should have. Making all those decisions for Nan at the funeral home…damn, that couldn’t have been easy.
My jaw tightens at the memory of how Johnnie kept glancing at me before finalizing anything. It’s like she needed—wanted my approval. I shouldn’t like that as much as I do. I shouldn’t feel anything about it at all.
It has to sting a little that her parents aren’t here to help carry these hard days with her.
