“Tell me to stop,” he said, lifting his head, his lips slick, “and I will.”
“Don’t you dare.”
He rose over her and braced his forearms beside her head, caging her in. She felt every hard line of him press againstwhere she ached.
“You have undone me,” he said, his breath uneven against her mouth. “I have built my whole life on wanting nothing, and now I want only you. I cannot think past you, Madeline. God help me, I lo—”
“Should I send a carriage to fetch you back, Madeline?” Lady Marlow asked, intruding into her granddaughter’s reverie.“You are miles away! Certainly, that tea is not much different from the usual one you have been drinking. Are you... Are you thinking about your husband?”
“W-what?” Madeline asked, her teacup rattling in her hand. She had been balancing the china successfully in her hand before her grandmother interrupted her thoughts. “Why would I think of him?”
“Your face is flushed red, but I am not sure. You truly seem out of it,” Lady Marlow commented, narrowing her shrewd eyes at her.
Why did she even visit her grandmother so soon after she and her husband shared a moment? She knew she could not face him after everything that happened, but she was still in a state of agitation. Perhaps she should have stayed locked in her room.
Madeline forced herself to look at the baroness, even though her eyes felt like they were still adjusting to the light. Her mind had been traipsing around in the dark, as if she were still in Kenneth’s bedchambers.
“I am perfectly fine,” she lied. “As for His Grace, he is more likely still occupied with his ledgers, Grandmama.”
She sounded steady enough. However, inside her, she could not forget. His palm still felt planted against the skin of her buttocks,and his voice roused feelings she never thought she had. Her body ached for more of his palm. More of him. Yes, she believed that she was losing her focus once more.
Focus.
Grandmama is looking at you.
“Working on his ledgers? During your honeymoon period?” Lady Marlow sounded aghast. “Tell me that you two have at least consummated your union?”
Madeline felt heat spread from her neck to her face, clinging to the roots of her hairline. She opened her mouth, but she closed it. What would she say, anyway?
“Oh, my,” Cathy murmured, looking less sorry than playful. “Grandmama, I think our dear Maddy is completely clueless. You can see it on her face.”
“It is not funny!” Madeline complained, her cheeks feeling warmer and redder.
“I believe my dear granddaughter may need my guidance,” Lady Marlow murmured, thoughtfully. “I do know some ways that involve silk ribbons and fans. Would you like me to instruct you on how to seduce your husband?”
Cathy burst out laughing. It was quite a sight to see the Duchess of Baxter almost spilling her tea.
“Maddy, do be careful now,” she huffed. “Grandmama’s guidance and tips were a disaster! I looked positively ridiculous the whole time I was following them, and Tristan was no help, either! He just let me do what I was doing. A warning that I looked silly would have sufficed.”
“A disaster? I saved your marriage, Cathy!” Grandmama huffed. “You and Tristan are happily married. You have managed to tame a rake, and it is all thanks to my lessons.”
“I am not sure this had anything to do with all the ridiculous things you had me do,” Cathy teased.“But this is not about me now. It is about our dear Madeline.”
“Oh, posh. Pray tell, Madeline. Why has your husband not consummated the marriage yet? He had clearly stated that he wished for a lady of procreational age in the advertisement, so obtaining an heir must be on his mind.”
“It is, but I... I do not wish to give myself to him that way,” she murmured. “Not yet anyway. I told him that I would not do it unless we were in love.”
Silence followed her declaration, making her catch her breath. She knew she sounded ridiculous, but was it so terrible to still hope for a love match?
“Madeline,” her grandmother began, her voice patient and gentle. “You are waiting for something that may not come unless you do something about it. As I had told Cathy, some men only fall in love after the deed is done. The consummation itself creates a bond between a man and a woman. You only have to be patient the first few times.”
“Grandmama, I want my first time to be special,” Madeline insisted, feeling defiance blending with longing in her veins. “I do not want a man who sees me as part of a contract. I do not want him to come to my chambers only to have an heir. He should truly love me.”
She thought about the friendship she had offered Kenneth. Perhaps that could have been a start. At least there would besome kind of affection, maybe not romantic right away. But he had seemed unwilling to even give her that.
“You are the most lovable person I know, Maddy,” Cathy said reassuringly. “You are a ray of sunshine everywhere you go. Surely, if given enough time, even the Duke of Huntington will warm to you. Just give him time.”
A ray of sunshine? Madeline remembered Lady Rose pushing her into the lake. She could still hear the other ladies’ laughter. She was far from lovable, but she could not have her sister know about that. Her cheeks burned at the thought. She knew her family would probably think she was still thinking of her husband, then, and she would let them think that. For now.
