CHAPTER 17
Kill and I were inseparable as the month seemed to be set in hyper-speed. While I studied, he would sit on my bed and strum his guitar or write in his ever-present notebook. We continued our runs, and of course, there were the mandatory practices, which became more grueling as they added more songs for me.
Kill was true to his word and didn’t look at anyone except me. He was still friendly with the fans making them feel special, but would always catch my eye and send me a wink to let me know I was still the only person on his mind.
As much as I fought it, I fell for Kill, hard. Whenever he would make comments about our future together, my heart would skip a beat, and my body yearned for his words to be true.
Van and Jessie were still going strong, mostly because she was so engrossed in school. Her parents backed off from the lectures so she could concentrate on her last year. Van seemed to be taking advantage of their time together and was doing his best to show Jessie how much she meant to him. He took her on romantic dates, surprising her time and again in a desperate attempt to keep her by his side.
Jet and Amy remained captured by their candy-induced love. I surmised that the candy they consumed made their lips so sticky they couldn’t separate for more than a couple of hours. Jet had taken on more guitar students, and his little side business was taking off, keeping both him and Amy away.
With the Tryptophan Torture Fest nearing, D was constantly on his phone making arrangements. The stress of the upcoming show kept him fully occupied.
I stopped reading the notes on my car, stuffing them in the box in my closet along with all the others.
Anytime I saw Trent on campus, I turned the other way. I wasn’t ready to try and be friends again. It was a toxic pattern with him. We would be friends until I did something he didn’t like, and then he would apologize...until the next time he behaved in exactly the same manner.
It reminded me of what my dad had said to me when I apologized during childhood. He’d always told me to think about whether I was really sorry, or if I was saying sorry until next time I made the same mistake. His piece of advice had stuck with me and I needed to start heeding it.
Now that I wasn't hiding my break-up with Jason, conversations with my dad were less stressful. Every now and then he would ask questions, curious about that time in my life. I became a master at changing the subject.
Halloween was on a Thursday, but the boys told Ray they would play half a set, which Ray was ecstatic over. I could almost see the dollar signs in his eyes.
After school let out for the day, the plan was to meet the girls at Ryan’s house to get ready.
On the way to my car, I spotted Kill leaning against my door, his sunglasses perched on his nose made him look edible. From all the stares coming his way, I could see I wasn't the only one who thought so. I glided over to him slowly, on a cloud of happiness.
“Well, hello there, Killer. What did I do to deserve your fine ass lounging on my car today?”
He laughed and pulled me to him, kissing me hard. When he moved away my knees were weak, I had to brace my hands on his chest. I stiffened as my eyes roamed over my note-free windshield. Maybe Jason was taking a break for the holiday.
“I couldn’t stand the thought of not seeing you until tonight.” He ran his nose over my neck as he spoke.
If my legs weren’t jello before, they certainly were now. I leaned into him and kissed him softly, loving the feel of his mouth on mine.
“You're so sweet."
He placed his finger on my lips, stopping me from saying more. “Don’t spread rumors, Slick. I have a reputation to uphold and you throwing the S word around is going to cramp my style."
I couldn't resist kissing him soundly, loving the way he made me feel. “Your secret's safe with me,” I whispered in his ear before biting it gently, making him groan.
“Thanks, Slick. I knew I could trust you,” he mumbled. “I have another secret for you.” His voice was serious, and the change in demeanor threw me off guard.
“Oh yeah? What's your secret, Killer?” My voice was light, but my shoulders tensed up. I didn't understand how he could go from laughing and joking to staring at me intensely through his sunglasses.
“I've fallen in love-head over your sexy-assed heels, with you.”
I was stunned. Internally, I jumped up and down while melting away at the same time. I must have stared at him for too long, because he began to shift uncomfortably on his feet.
“So... Uhm...” He took the hand splayed across my waist and rubbed at the back of his neck, finally snapping me out of my trance.
“I love you too. I didn’t think my heart would be pieced together enough to ever give it to anyone, especially so soon. But every fragment of my shattered heart belongs to you.”
He smiled, and the tension faded. “And here I thought I was the creative one with words,” he replied, picking me up and swinging me around in a circle.
“I love this girl,” he screamed, scaring a couple who were walking to their cars. They looked over at us as we made complete asses out of ourselves. I think they giggled, but I was so wrapped up in him, I didn’t pay close attention. Once we were dizzy from spinning and saying those three spellbinding words, I felt complete.
“Alright, Slick. I know you have to go and get ready, but I had to see you first. I've wanted to tell you I love you for a while now, and I couldn’t hold it back any longer. I told you I had more secrets.”
