Chapter Fifteen
Tripwas by my driver side door before I was able to put Dora in park. He helped me out, which was good since nothing seemed to be functioning correctly.
With my hand in his we walked silently to my apartment. After missing the lock for the third time Trip took the key out of my hand and led me into the living room.
My breathing was shallow as I sat next to him on the couch. Trip let go of my hand and confusion set in. All the way home I pictured him pouncing before the door clicked shut. His hesitation set off my anxiety and I tried to come up with a statistic off the top of my mushy head.
Maybe he realized this was a mistake on the drive here.
“Trip?”
Trip threw his baseball hat on the table and thrust his fingers through his hair. I watched him out of the corner of my eye, trying to gauge what he was thinking.
“I shouldn’t have kissed you,” he stated, his hand flopping to his side of the couch.
My soul crushed into a thousand pieces and even if I collected them all, I would never be whole again. But he didn’t need to know.
“Things happen in the heat of the moment. Don’t worry about it.” I applauded myself for sounding so levelheaded.
Trip interlocked our hands and studied them before meeting my eyes. With him touching me I wasn’t able to hide the tremors of pain wracking my body.
“Darlin‘ don’t get the wrong idea. I wanted to kiss you.” He pressed his lips together until they turned white.
I pulled my hands out of his and clasped them on my lap.
“Well, you did and now it’s done?” I couldn’t help but end it in a question. He wasn’t making sense and my brain was in too much pain to decipher body language.
Trip smiled, brushing his finger down my cheek. I leaned into his touch, knowing what a pathetic gesture it was. With fascination, I watched fire pool in Trip’s eyes as he traced my face with his calloused hand.
His fingers grasped my chin and pulled me forward. I went willingly, craving his touch more than my next peanut butter and jelly sandwich. We met in the middle, our mouths clashing together in frustration.
Trip’s hands found my waist and hauled me on his lap. I ground into him, moaning when I felt his hard erection pushing against his jeans.
His lips left mine and trailed down my neck. He sucked in a ragged breath as he licked my collarbone. “What about softball?” he asked, kissing his way back up my neck.
“I don’t know that position, but I’m willing to give it a try,” I answered him, my hands pushing his shirt up so I could touch his abs.
Trip let out a chuckle as he sucked my bottom lip in his mouth. My eyes rolled back in my head at the ecstasy I was in with his mouth on mine.
Trip let go of my lip and rested his chin on the top of my head. I continued to stroke his chest, marveling at the dips, no longer sure what the hell was happening.
“I’m serious, McKenna.”
“So am I. I’ve never heard of the softball position, but I’m willing to try.”
“I meant real softball. I don’t want you to lose your place on the team.”
“How many times do I have to tell you? I don’t care about softball. Like Claire said there isn’t much life after college for a softball player. I never wanted to play overseas and I don’t want to be in the Olympics. I’m done. It was you who wouldn’t let me quit. Besides, I owe Claire the position for what I brought her into.”
“But this is your last year. You’re going to start working right out of school. I don’t want you missing out on anything. And Claire isn’t innocent. If I were to tell you half of what she propositioned me with you wouldn’t be feeling as guilty as you do.”
“It’s not just the guilt.” I moved so I could look at him, not removing my hands from his chest I wasn’t stupid. “Is that why you never tried anything with me? Because you were worried I’d miss softball? That I’d regret leaving the team for you?”
He gazed directly in my eyes, letting me know how serious he was. “I told you, I wanted to be a better person. You made me want to do that. As hard as it was I stayed away from you, or at least as much as I could, so you could finish softball and graduate. I refuse to let you resent me, or our relationship later on because I took things away from you. You’re so young and you have so much in front of you.”
Tears clouded my eyes. I blinked, letting them fall down my cheeks, still not taking my hands off his chest.
“Trip, I seriously don’t care about those things.”
