“Exactly.” His mother grabbed her laundry basket and shot him a cold glare.
Kaiden was at a loss, completely adrift with no idea what to do next. Every fiber of his body wanted to scream, to rage against his family and their constant war against him. Another part wanted to flee, to find the people who made him feel seen, safe, and sane.
But he couldn’t go running to Dylan or Rus, not when he was still lost on the dilemma of what they meant to him. What they meant to each other. He needed time to think, to figure out his feelings, to let them realize their feelings. He was certain they liked each other, and he started to spiral, worried perhaps he was the singular obstacle standing in the way of Rus and Dylan from taking the next step.
Chapter Twelve
Rusdidn’t know what to do with himself, so he used the three-day weekend to drive home and finally took his mom up on an impromptu trip. She’d begged him to return home every chance he had since enrolling in college, and after his assault at Himbos, she’d pleaded even more. Hell, she threatened to drive up to the college herself, speak to the local authorities, and put pressure on them for results in the type of way only a mother could do.
Unfortunately, his parents had also decided to use this particular three-day weekend as an escape from their routine. They were out of town, leaving Rus mostly alone except for his older sister, who locked herself away in her bedroom.
Rus was hoping for a distraction, clarity, a chance to work through his thoughts, maybe talk to his mom vaguely about what was happening. Instead, all he got was a quiet house to ponder and overthink what happened between Dylan and Kaiden. More like what didn’t happen.
Unable to sleep and in no mood to drink, Rus decided to step outside for a smoke and wander old trails to clear his mind.These haunts used to be an escape so he could have a cigarette without getting in trouble, to smoke a joint without getting a “back in my day” commentary on the wild 80s, or maybe even make out without worrying about a sibling snitching and busting open his bedroom door.
The trails were great for hiking, which meant lots of strangers passing by, so Rus and his friends all learned which off-road paths to wander when looking for a bit of peace and quiet.
He made his way through the woods, deep in the darkness, with only the moon’s light peering between pockets of trees to guide him and muscle memories to lead him. Eventually, he found his way to a favorite haunt. A broken-down playset. The pony spring riders with faded colors and cigarette burns around the eyes. The sandbox dirt had finally grown over with more plants than the actual forest floor around the sandbox.
All Rus cared about was the swing. He carefully rested on the weathered seat and finished his cigarette.
“Ikky!” squealed a high-pitched voice.
Rus balled a fist, then buried his annoyance for the worst nickname in the world. To any bystander, they’d assume Ikky was icky, and the person shouting at him wanted to imply Rus was gross in the most juvenile manner. Unfortunately, it was so much worse than that. Nope, she was one of the few people who knew Rus’ full name and taunted him with the worst nickname ever.
The teachers who knew Rus’ name never had the chance to share it in class since his scowl and quick protest always interjected their attempt. His parents stopped using his full name when he declared he would only be known as Rus henceforth. Yes, he used the phrase ‘henceforth’ in his argument, attempting to sound grown at the age of nine. Thenhe proceeded to give the entire house the silent treatment until everyone abided by his choice. His brother broke that pact once on Rus’ tenth birthday and got a black eye and two missing teeth. Baby teeth, but the point was made.
“What brings you to my neck of the woods?” Lana Alvar took delicate steps between the thin trees.
Her flowy pink blouse had a white glow to it under the starry night. The frayed edges of her short shorts barely peeked out from beneath her top, leaving her legs exposed. She’d tanned a lot since the last time he’d seen her. As she stepped between the trees, she gripped one, running her fingers along the bark before swinging a bit. The slight twirl around the thin trees helped launch Lana forward with her last few steps.
Chaotic and reckless, just as Rus recalled.
Lana barreled ahead, colliding with him and nearly knocking him out of the swing as she turned Rus into a seat of her own. Straddling his waist, she balanced herself on the rusted chains of the swing.
“Well?” She let out a heavy exhale, blowing her blonde bangs out of her face. It’d been a long time since Lana was a blonde. Rus liked it along with the pixie cut she’d gone with.
Rus craned his neck and groaned. He couldn’t tell if Lana was flirting or teasing. With her, it was never so simple. Part of what kept him locked in her orbit for so many years. First loves were the hardest to quit. Even if she was the absolute worst fifth-grade girlfriend in the world. Breaking his heart over lunch and then ignoring him until seventh grade. But that rekindled spark kept him fawning until ninth grade, and at her side until senior year.
Chances were, Rus would still be attached to Lana if she hadn’t disappeared to Europe shortly after graduation withoutso much as a goodbye kiss. When she returned two years later, he’d created a new life at college. Though occasionally, in moments like this, he questioned those choices.
“You’re no fun anymore,” Lana said, sliding off Rus and plopping into the swing beside him.
When the entire set shook, both of them clutched their chains like it’d make a difference if the bars collapsed around and atop them.
“That freshman fifteen is hitting me hard.” Lana laughed, pretending her weight had any true role in this decrepit swing set’s rumble.
Lana was a tiny thing, shorter than Rus by several inches, and very slender. Still, for such a small thing, her legs extended quite long and graceful as she kicked back on the swing.
“You’re in college?”
“Community college,” she replied. “Nothing fancy like you, darling.”
“No, smarter,” he said with a chuckle. “You’ll get a real skill and none of the debt.”
“Well, I always was smarter than you.”
“That how you knew I’d be out here?”
