It was petty, packing up and leaving in the dead of morning without a word. But he’d exhausted himself on one-way conversations and guilt trips and pointless debates. All he wanted was to be on his own.
Rus and Dylan piled boxes into the back of the truck. Well, mostly alone. He could make room for his boyfriends. His friends. They were the most reliable people in his life.
Kaiden’s stuff proved easy to move. He’d packed most of it away before Rus and Dylan came over. He left behind his dresser and nightstand. Both were mostly filled with his nephews’ belongings at this point anyway, and he figured the little guys could use the furniture more.
“You sure you wanna leave the bed behind?”
“Absolutely.” Kaiden made a sour face.
He’d had that creaky, squeaky twin mattress since he was fifteen years old. Every time he considered replacing it, something came up, funds ran low, or he simply couldn’t bring himself to waste money on another dreadful twin bed. He wanted a full, a queen, a king. Anything with real space. Mainly, he just wanted space, something he never got in this home.
“Be careful, please.” Kaiden directed Rus and Dylan with the only real furniture he needed help moving.
His vanity desk and collection of lights and mirrors had really started piling up in the basement. They’d become his very own treasure trove, a safety net when hiding, and the perfect makeup station when putting on his face.
Even so, Dylan managed to Tetris everything into the back of the truck, while Rus did the heavy lifting.
Kaiden climbed into the truck, Dylan ended up wedged in the middle seat, and Rus tried to light a smoke until Kaiden snatched away his lighter.
“Alison would kill me.”
Rus sighed.
“But don’t worry, there’s a nice little patio at my new place with your name on it.”
“So, we finally get to see the new digs, huh?” Rus raised his eyebrows.
Kaiden drove through the city and a little more out of the way than he preferred. It was definitely bordering on the other side of town from Rus and Dylan and work, but he’d already accounted for the extra travel time. In the end, it’d be worth it.
While the pride he initially held for his accomplishment kept him buzzing from the day he signed the papers, it did fizzle out a bit as he pulled up to the trailer park.
“I know it doesn’t look like much,” Kaiden said, driving down the main neighborhood street before turning onto one of the dirt roads. “But—”
“But nothing,” Dylan said. “I’ve helped move a few former residents out into these parts. One of the few spots without a deathly rent.”
True. It also proved to be one of the only rental places that didn’t require proof of income three times the rent or a co-signer with a high credit score.
“Yeah, folks don’t think much of trailers,” Kaiden added. “But it’s pretty sturdy, I think.”
“A home is a home is a home,” Rus said. “And it’s all yours.”
Kaiden pulled into the patch of dead grass that constituted his current driveway. They went to work, bringing boxes inside, piling them up in the empty living room. Aside from a few basic necessities and some kitchenware, Kaiden hadn’t gotten much to spruce the place up.
“It looks a little rough right now, but I’m getting tons of stuff soon,” Kaiden said, believing he could turn this trailer into a real home.
Despite how small it appeared on the outside, there was a lot of room within. The front door led to the living room, which connected to the nearby kitchen that had a ton of cabinets and counter space. On either end of the trailer was a bedroom, each of them big in its own respect. The smaller bedroom didn’t have a walk-in bathroom like the master, but it still had a full bath in the tiny hallway beside it, which connected back to the living room. All in all, the place could easily house more than justKaiden, but it was just Kaiden’s. He let out a small smile. For the first time in his life, he had space that belonged to just him. No sharing, no compromising, no making do.
“I like it.” Dylan grinned.
“Thank you,” Kaiden sheepishly replied, always unable to truly accept a compliment.
The three of them worked to carry in the boxes and a few belongings Kaiden had managed to get together. With everything piled up in the empty living room, Kaiden suddenly found every doubt he’d repressed creeping back up. Everything he had ignored because he was too busy and exhausted working toward this very goal.
“I know moving into an empty trailer on the other side of town with almost no savings or safety net seems rash, but I didn’t want to spend another six months planning, scraping, and doing it the so-called smart way. I didn’t want to lose out on this trailer. Sure, it’s not fancy, but it’s solid and it’s safe and it’s mine.”
Rus and Dylan didn’t respond; they merely stared at Kaiden, which only made him more anxious.
“Maybe it would’ve been smarter to save up longer or rent a room with some stranger, but I couldn’t do that. And I couldn’t stay where I was. Every day in that house ate away at my sanity, my happiness, my belief,” Kaiden said, pouring out all the reasons this was the right choice and not some impulsive mistake where he’d fall flat on his face in a few months. This had to work. It just had to. “If I stayed another month, I’d start to think it was impossible to ever claw my way out. I just needed to go.”
