“Retail hell,” Dylan said, explaining Kaiden’s desire to earn a little extra this holiday season since he’d moved into his own place. “And before you say anything, yes, I told him about our extra furniture in storage. He’s very much of the persuasion to prove to himself he can do this on his own.”
“Hmmm, well, remind him that support does not detract from independence,” Jasmine said, sipping her drink. “It’s a big step getting your first place.”
“I guess.” Dylan shrugged.
“It’s a big place, isn’t it?” Jasmine asked, offering Dylan the other glass of sweet tea, hold the liquor.
“Meh. Biggish,” Dylan said. “Two bedrooms, two baths, so I guess kind of. More space than he needs.”
“But enough to invite others over.”
“Well, yeah, but even Rus has company, and he lives in a little box of a building.”
“You spend a lot of time at their places. Sometimes more there than here.”
“I don’t think I spend that much time with them,” Dylan replied.
“More than I’ve ever seen from you before.”
“Too much time?” Dylan’s chest tightened, wondering if perhaps he’d dropped the ball somewhere, if maybe Jasmine was using her tea and tequila conversation to allude to Dylan slacking around the house.
Had he forgotten any appointments recently? Were the residents noticing his absence? Were his sleepovers affecting how the house ran?
“If there’s something I did, please—”
“You haven’t done anything,” Jasmine said with a light laugh. “You’re the perfect person to keep this place running.”
Dylan released his anxious breath and relaxed a bit.
“The fact is, it’s a lot of work to keep this home organized and successful,” Jasmine said, locking her gaze onto Dylan. “I closed a few chapters of my life to help others write their own stories. That was a decision I was completely fine with, but it’s still a lot to ask for of others.”
Dylan understood that in a sense. Until Kaiden and Rus, he hadn’t had the best of luck navigating romance, often ignoring possibilities because it complicated his routine.
“You’ve put your life on hold since you were seventeen,” Jasmine explained.
That was a weird way to phrase it. Dylan never considered it a pause in his life, more like a chance to actually dive into his life.
It took Dylan a year of living in Dorothy’s Home before he felt safe. Took him another year in the house before he truly accepted himself. Once that happened, he buried himself in outreach activism, doing everything to help the home gain visibility. His senior year of high school was a terrifying one. His grades were just okay at best and frightening at worst. College seemed impossible. Careers seemed insurmountable. Life away from Dorothy’s Home was a daunting hill. Helping around the house was a dream, and Jasmine gladly made room for him to continue helping.
“I was okay with that because you needed that. I’ve watched you ignore your own desires for over a decade now, focused on this house, the people living here, the community that rallies around us, but never yourself.”
Dylan shook his head, dumbfounded.
“So, now that I see you exploring your feelings, finding someone—someones—who make you happy, I want you to know it’s okay if that happiness takes your life in a different direction.”
Dylan didn’t understand what Jasmine was saying, where this was coming from, or why she thought his relationship changed anything. Kaiden and Rus had never once stood in the way of his work.
“It’s not a bad thing.” Jasmine smiled, big and genuine, yet it seemed cruel all the same.
“Are you telling me to move out?” Dylan’s voice trembled. “To quit?”
“No, sweetie. You’re welcome here as long as you want. Personally, this house runs so much better with you in it.” Jasmine gently pressed a hand to his shoulder. “But as long as you are hiding in here, you’re putting your life on pause.”
Jasmine released Dylan, finished her drink, and tossed it in the dishwasher before hitting the start cycle.
“I don’t want you to miss out on something great because you’ve put obligations ahead of your happiness. The only person you’re obliged to is yourself, Dylan.”
With that, Jasmine took her leave, and Dylan attempted to process even a fraction of what they’d discussed. His life with Kaiden and Rus had kept him afloat for months now, so much so that he didn’t realize the ground beneath him was shifting. All Dylan had ever known was Dorothy’s Home. It was his only safety in this world. Did he really want to step away from the house? But what if Jasmine had a point? What if retreating into the program prevented him from finding happiness?
