What was next? Were these fuckers going to claim one could pray away a demon? There were plenty of fools who believedsuch things, and that always led to the death of the host, and often the deaths of many more.
“Exactly,” Reporter Chris said, his voice grating on my ears. “Claiming to be America’s Champion, he should be able to at least bounce back from this little possession.”
“Enchanter Barlowe hasn’t let it slow him down,” Reporter Johnson said, cutting to a clip of the devout Christian enchanter holding a vigil while casting his Heavenly Ice—quite the name he picked for his unique branch magic.
Not everyone got the opportunity to name their branch, since the Department of Magical Records would dictate one’s official branch. However, if the witch in question was deemed the first on record with the licensing facility, then they got to name it. As such, this extremely religious witch chose a name to reflect his faith.
“But see, this is what I’m talking about,” Reporter Chris said. “Enchanter Barlowe should’ve moved up to the number one ranked enchanter in the Global Guild. He was ranked third. With Kingston and Stone, the former number one and two enchanters, stepping down, it only makes sense that Barlowe would move to number one. Yet this new rearrangement of the top ten feels very fake.”
“Yup, the math isn’t mathing, that’s for sure,” Reporter Johnson said. “But we all know it’s part of a political stunt. A woke agenda meant to cater to the witches who cast more PC policies than actual magic. Honestly, the top ten seems to be aiming for some type of diversity Olympics—”
“Oh, fuck this.” I flipped the station, unable to bear another second of these assholes.
I landed on Beverly Cleverly Live just in time to catch Gladiatrix mid-interview. Good, I hadn’t missed it yet.
Beverly was a big woman, tall and wide, with most of her height in her torso. It made her tower over Gladiatrix as the women sat on the couch. Just looking at her, she didn’t seem like the girl next door. Still, Beverly had this captivating demeanor, charming audiences for years as a singer-songwriter, filling stadiums and hitting notes even the best magics couldn’t hit. I wasn’t a fan, but even I enjoyed her bigger singles from time to time. Now, she used that charm to captivate American audiences from the comfort of their home.
“So, how do you address the rumors that your rank change had to do with politics over talent?”
“Rankings are an extremely complicated matter,” Gladiatrix answered with a smile. “It doesn’t help that every state, every city, honestly, has their own qualifiers when it comes to ranking their guild members.”
“Plus, the schools,” Beverly chimed in. “My daughters attend two different academies, each focused on different specialties, and let me say, the ranking systems at their schools don’t add up the same way.”
I scoffed. Specialty academies didn’t exist. They were merely titles of elitism to ensure that a particular academy wasn’t forced to cater to unsavory students. Basically, the specialty allowed them to discriminate without being called out for it, keeping their wealthiest witch families in a coveted private education.
“Precisely,” Gladiatrix replied to Beverly’s anecdote. “As for my ranking, it’s often being reevaluated, as any member of the Global Guild, especially the top ten. After the incident in Chicago, it was deemed that my actions pushed me over Enchanter Barlowe’s placement.”
“You mean where you single-handedly fought him, Kingston, and Stone?” Beverly paused for the audience’s applause. “Then safely exorcised the demons possessing them.”
“Not single-handedly,” Gladiatrix corrected. “There was plenty of help on the field before and after I stepped in. But I did face off against those three. It’s important to note that the demons possessing them weren’t able to harness the full extent of their magical capabilities.”
“Yes, but they were still devils. Three devils. And you yourself had also just shaken off a possession.”
Gladiatrix laughed. “I’d hardly call passing out from sheer exhaustion ‘shaking it off.’ But yes, I did manage to collect myself enough to help purge the devils from the area.”
“Humble and all powerful,” Beverly said, gesturing to Gladiatrix. “Can we just all take another moment to applaud the spectacular Gladiatrix?”
The audience roared, cheering louder and longer than before. Some even stood up, practically on cue, for the cameras that panned through the crowd of overly excited audience members.
Beverly Cleverly waited for her audience to settle before moving back into her interview. “Your top ranking might be the biggest news in the Global Guild, but it’s certainly not the only change happening, is it?”
Gladiatrix beamed. “Yes, there are many things happening that I’m so proud of. For years, I’ve been advocating that the Global Guild can only truly call itself a guild of the world if we open our membership rankings up to other nations.”
“And you’ve done just that.” Beverly pointed to the big screen behind her, showing pictures of masked vigilantes from the UK. “Several of these witches assisted in bringing a bit of order back to the streets of Chicago.”
Milo and Gladiatrix had wrangled nearly twenty of the masked witches, but I only spotted two of them, King Liberty and Queen of Jesters, when they fought off the other possessed top ten enchanters.
“I’m thrilled we’re making room for other highly qualified witches,” Gladiatrix said.
“Now, I heard this will open complications,” Beverly said. “Many nations don’t use the enchanter ranking system.”
“Yes, they won’t be Global Guild enchanters,” Gladiatrix said with a coy smile. “But as we addressed earlier, the ranking system differs everywhere, by everyone. It’s subjective and objective, outdated and rigorous, and many more things. These are still highly capable witches, though. Perhaps the Global Guild needs new terminology suited just for us, to represent every witch from every nation.”
“Hmmm.” Beverly made an inquisitively playful expression. “More rumblings planned by our number one enchanter? I can’t wait to hear all about it. But first, let’s break for a commercial.”
During the commercial break, I scrolled through my phone, checking socials, and noticing a few articles relating to Gladiatrix’s new ranking, the shakeup in the Global Guild, and other countries being approached. So far, fifteen different countries were rumored to be in negotiations to officially join the Global Guild. This would completely change the face of the magical industry. It might even open exchange programs on the academy level. That’d be quite a sight, allowing students the opportunity to learn how magical policy worked in another nation.
Beverly Cleverly Live returned with her and Gladiatrix doing a little dance with the audience before making their way back to the couch.
