“No, I think YOU get sick of that shit! Nobody paid me any mind until I became the last one standing! I feel alone! I feel like I’ve been missing a part of me! I’ve NEVER BEEN THIS LONG WITHOUT TALKING TO MY PARENTS! Do you not hear me!? I went from living in the house with them to this! TO THIS! Something is always happening with my body! My eyes are turning red! I’m always tasting fucking blood in my mouth! There is shit happening with my body that I cannot explain! That the fucking moon goddess ofwhateverrrr!” She mocked with a deep voice. Asha snickered while Isis nudged her leg.
“It’s not funny…”
“Whaaat? It is… Maggie stays having jokes even when she’s upset.”
“I’m going out with a fucking werewolf now! I’m still processing ALL OF THIS on top of, oh shit, I’m blacking out! I’m having panic attacks! I’m this! I’m that and you want me to lay LOW!? I have nobody in the First Family to talk to because NOBODY IS TALKING TO ME! I’m EXPECTED TO CARRY ALL THEIR BULLSHIT ON MY BACK WHILE PRESENTING AS THE PERFECT STUDENT! The perfect Drew Collins woman with the perfect Drew Collins man! Where is everyone!? WHERE IS BELLAMY?! Where is Lovely!? Where is Draco orsomebody that can help me understand what’s going on?!” She cried. “YOU ARE NOT ENOUGH FOR ME! NOT ANYMORE!”
It got quiet as Asha began braiding my hair. Souxie continued to read and take notes. We couldn’t hear a sound, not a single word was uttered in the halls from her room.
“You think they started fucking?” Asha whispered.
“I doubt it,” Isis replied. “That doesn’t seem like her style…angry sex.”
“There is such a thing as…angry sex?” I asked.
“It’s really hot,” Isis grinned with a wiggle of her brow. “Very…um…how do you say…sudden…quick.”
“Intense,” Souxie added as Isis pointed to the ceiling.
“Bitch, I knew you were listening,” Asha accused as she pointed the comb in Souxie’s direction.
“Yes! Intense!” Isis beamed.
“And nobody gets hurt?” I asked.
“Not if you don’t want them to,” Asha said with her tongue sticking out.
Asha let the first few braids fall against my chest as I pinched the ends and quietly burned them with my fingers, letting the strands melt together to seal the ends.
“I think they started up again,” Isis whispered as we listened to the muffled voices become clear.
“You don’t understand, and you’re not trying to understand! I can’t even try and make you see what I see or feel what I feel because you can’t! You won’t, Namir! How can you…”
I could hear the tears in her words. It became quiet before she just exploded, causing all of us to look up towards the door, even Souxie.
“Say it! Just say it, Namir!” Maggie screamed. “You already came out with it; you might as well just say it!”
“I said stop saying nobody paid you any mind last year! That’s not true! All of that shit happened because of you!”
“All of what?! JUST SAY IT! DON’T BITCH OUT–––”
“THE MURDERS!” Namir screamed as Isis gasped silently before Asha cupped her mouth shut for her. “People have died because they paid you some fucking mind, Maggie! Shit got moved around, my brother is no longer here, my Dad is no longer here! I WENT AGAINST EVERYONE IN MY FAMILY BECAUSE PEOPLE PAID YOU SOME FUCKING MIND! So don’t say nobody cared about you until you became the last family standing! There is a growing mob of people waiting to see what happens next when somebody pays you some fucking mind! This is why I’m stressing to you to keep safe and to trust me! I gave up everything to be with you! You are all I have left! I’m about ready to give up my job because of you and you’re saying I’m not enough?!”
“No.”
My mouth dropped, not even remembering how all of us except for Souxie were suddenly against the door with our ears plastered to the wood for a listen. The dramatic end to the fight was something out of the movies and television. I could not believe this is my life and I was here front and center for it.
“I want my Mom,” she cried suddenly. “I want my Dad. I want…I can’t keep pretending I’m okay or…or I’m good…I’m strong for the sake of making everyone else comfortable around me…You just…blamed me for something I can’t…I can’t even explain because I…”
“So I’m not enough?” Namir asked. All of us pressed our bodies against the door for a listen, holding our breaths. Ilooked back at Souxie, ever so composed as she continued to flip through her books and take notes.
“Namir you’re not even hearing me,” Maggie cried.
“I heard you say I’m not enough. All that other shit doesn’t fucking matter. I heard you say I’m not enough for you. Maybe it’s a good thing you don’t have your parents. Less First Family the world needs to deal with. If you can’t trust that I’m trying to protect you and keep you safe from this bullshit? If you can’t trust that there are people around you doing everything they possibly can to make sure you’re straight then I don’t know what else to tell you. I’m not about to keep arguing and begging you to trust me and my word. I’m not enough? Me? Namir? I don’t give a fuck about anybody else, I’m not enough? Cool. Say less.”
I could hear Maggie crying and the sound of footsteps going down the stairs before the main door opened and slammed shut. Nobody moved or said a word. It was so tense in the air that I felt my hand coming to my neck as if someone were cutting off my breathing. The door swung open and of course Maggie stood there, eyes red with stains of blood smeared against her cheek as she sniffed a few times.
“Okay,” she coughed before clasping her hands together. Her hands trembled as she scooped the white strands back from her face. “Alright sooo…yeah that happened,” she laughed.
