I lower myself onto the edge of my niece’s bed and brush her brown hair away from her face. “I did. Did you have fun hanging with Janelle?”
Alyssa offers me a sleepy smile as she bunches up one of her many fleece blankets and rests her cheek against it. “I like babysitting.”
“You’re really good at it.”
“I think I want to be a mom someday. Or maybe I’ll just work in a school with little kids like you.”
I tuck her comforter around her. “You can be anything you want to be.”
“Did you always want to be a librarian?”
I swallow the truth and offer her something close enough to it. “I love books, so what better place to be than surrounded by them all day?”
“What book are you reading right now?”
I can’t exactly tell my ten-year-old niece that I’m reading a why-choose romance where the heroine gets railed by four dudes at the same time.
“Uh, it’s a love story.”
She grins. “You always read love stories. What’s this one about?”
“Well, it’s about a woman who falls in love with more than one man at the same time. And she has to figure out what she’s going to do about it.”
Alyssa’s eyebrows lift. “Can you love more than one person like that?”
“I think so. Love doesn’t have a limit, and it looks different for everyone.”
She hums as her eyes droop closed. “Have you ever been in love?”
My chest squeezes. “I think I was. But I was in college, so I was young.”
She peels open one eye to look at me. “Do you think you’ll ever get married?”
I let out a soft chuckle and lean down to press a kiss to the top of her head. “You always have so many questions.”
“Mom used to call me inquisitive.”
“She was right. Maybe you’ll be a reporter one day.”
Her smile fades. “I miss her.”
“I do too.” I glance at the picture frame sitting on her nightstand, tears stinging my eyes the way they always do when I think about my sister. “Make sure you always love your brother, okay? He’s going to be your best friend in life.”
“Like Mom was yours?”
I nod.
Allie wasn’t just my big sister. She was my very best friend. The one I’d call whenever I needed help or advice. When she died, I couldn’t call her to get me through it. I was alone. And it was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to go through. It’d always been us against the world growing up. When our father left and Mom had to get a second job to make ends meet, Allie was there by my side, helping me with homework and making sure I was fed and taken care of. Then when Mom died the summer before I left for college, Allie made sure that I still went, and helped me with some of the tuition.
She’s the reason I am where I am today, the reason I’m the person I am today, and I owe it to her to make sure her kids have the best life they possibly can.
“Goodnight, Aunt Presley. I love you.”
I press a kiss to the top of Alyssa’s head and whisper, “Love you most.”
I peek into Avery’s room after I close Alyssa’s door, but he’s already passed out, so I head to my bedroom down the hall.
I can busy myself with work and the kids during the day, but nighttime is when the loneliness creeps in. My thoughts and memories—of my sister, of McKinley and Kellerman, of the life I once had, of how I’m doing a shit job at raising these kids—take over my mind, making it hard to fall asleep.
