“She’s upset with me because of how I quit school in Chicago. So is my dad. Every time we talk, we end up fighting about it.”
I look down at my phone and see that she’s calling me again.
“Crap, I’m sorry, Briar. I didn’t realize you guys weren’t getting along,” Blake says.
I let out a heavy sigh. “Yeah, it’s been hard.”
I think about my parents’ reaction when I told them I unenrolled from college. How surprised and upset they were. How angry they got when I told them I left because of my breakup with Logan.
I didn’t tell them everything though…No one knows exactly what happened between Logan and me…No one knows the real reason I left suddenly in the middle of last semester.
If I told my parents, it would just make them even more mad at me…even more ashamed and embarrassed of me.
I sigh as I look down at my phone. “I should probably answer this,” I say to Blake. “She’ll just keep calling and texting the whole night.”
I slide away out of the booth and walk to the back of the diner. I find a dark, quiet corner in the hallway near the restrooms.
“Hey, Mom. What’s up?”
“Finally. Briar, were you planning on ignoring me forever? I’ve been calling you for the past few days, trying to get a hold of you.”
I sigh. “Mom, I texted you that I was busy. I’ve had a lot of homework, and I’ve been working a lot of shifts at the library, and?—”
“You never had this problem when you were going to college in Chicago,” she says, interrupting me. “I don’t understand why you can’t do something as simple as return a phone call to your own mother.”
I swallow back the words I’m dying to say.Because all you ever do when you call me now is tell me what a disappointment I am for quitting school, which always leads to an argument, and I hate arguing with you.
“Mom, I’m sorry I haven’t called you back, but school and work are keeping me busy. I don’t have time to answer you every single time you and Dad call me.”
“Don’t take that attitude with me, young lady. You know how hard your dad and I worked to save money so you could go to school in Chicago. And then, one day, out of the blue, you call us and tell us that you quit in the middle of the semester and that you’re going to school in Denver instead.”
Guilt slices through me. As upset as I am at my parents, I feel awful for making them waste their money paying for a school I dropped out of.
“You went on and on and on about what great Spanish and French programs they had at Chicago University. How their study abroad program was the best,” she says. “And then one day you just forget about all that and want to transfer to Denver. So ridiculous how you changed your mind just like that.”
I hear her snapping her fingers in the background. When I think about how I missed my chance to study abroad, I want to cry. I’ve been dreaming about studying in either Mexico orFrance since high school. But now I can’t because I’m too busy playing catch-up at Hollis as a new transfer student, and I don’t have room in my schedule to study abroad if I want to graduate on time.
And even if I did have the time to do it, I don’t have the money.
“Mom, I told you how sorry I am for the money you and Dad spent on me. I’ve told you that so many times. And I told you that I’ll pay you back. It’ll take time for me to save the money, but I swear I will.”
She lets out a heavy sigh, laced with disappointment. “Briar, how in the world are you going to do that? You had to take out loans to attend Hollis. Even though we told you a million times not to take out student loans. Someone as young as you shouldn’t be going into that much debt. I can’t believe you’d do something so stupid.”
Frustration cuts through the guilty feeling inside of me. When I told my parents I was enrolling at Hollis instead, they were so mad at me for quitting school in Chicago that they refused to pay for my tuition at Hollis. Which was fine. I didn’t expect them to pay for my schooling, which is why I took out loans. I know it’s not ideal, but it’s my choice to make. But hearing them insulting me for it makes me feel like crap.
“Really, Briar. Your dad and I raised you to be smarter than this,” my mom says, her tone dismissive and tired all at once. “How could you do two such stupid things in a row? You dropped out of college because of a breakup. And then you take out a bunch of student loans. So, so stupid.”
Tears prick at my eyes. This is why I can’t tell them what really happened between Logan and me. They’ll never understand just how bad it was for me…How it almost broke me.
They’ll just think I was being stupid and foolish.
“Mom, stop. I’m not going to keep talking to you if you’re just going to call me stupid again,” I say, my voice trembling as I struggle not to cry.
She makes an annoyed sound. “Fine. The reason I called you is because your father and I would like to come visit you in Denver.”
I lean against the wall, my head spinning. “What? Why?”
“Because you’re our daughter, and we haven’t seen you in months.” She pauses. “And because we’d like to talk to you about enrolling back at Chicago University.”
