Thea settles back against her pillows and I pull the comforter up around her neck. I press a kiss to her forehead.
“We can talk more about this in the morning,” I say as I reach the doorframe.
She nods against her pillow. I quietly walk down the hallway, the floor creaking under my feet as I go. I sigh and run my hands through my hair as I close my bedroom door. I hear the click of the doorknob and glance out my window for a moment before I sit down on theedge of my bed, reaching for my phone. I unlock it and shoot off a quick text to Charlie asking if he’s still awake.
He calls in an instant.
“Is everything okay?” he asks. “Are you okay? Thea?”
I sigh as I crawl under the covers and lean against my headboard.
“I don’t know,” I admit. I rub my face with my left hand. “I’m worried about Thea. She’s not acting right.”
"What do you mean?” Charlie’s voice is low and laced with sleep.
“She’s been having nightmares about the wreck, she had a date with…” I pause, “a jackass kid… She’s not making good decisions.”
“She’s twenty,” Charlie says. “She’s going to make some dumbass decisions. We sure as hell did at that age.”
“Yeah, but this isn’t like her. This seems different. She’s got a good head on her shoulders, but she’s not acting like it.”
He sighs softly. “She also just lost her mom and uprooted her entire life, Beth Ann.”
“I don’t need logic right now, I just need you to listen to me.”
I can hear him smile through the phone. “Okay, Miss Bossy.”
“I am not bossy.”
“Sure,” Charlie says, drawing the word out in a playful manner.
A smile teases its way out of the corner of my lips. “I just don’t know how to help her,” I admit. “I can’t bake my way out of this one.”
“As long as she’s got you, she’ll be okay. You think she’d see a therapist? That might be a good place to start.” I hear his bed creak.
“I don’t know. Maybe.” I glance back out my window. “I just feel helpless.”
“I know.” I hear him sigh. “But you’re not. You’ve got me.”
“Thank God,” I say as I transfer my phone to my other hand. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
A comfortable silence settles over us for a few moments and I listen to Charlie’s rhythmic breathing.
“I really miss her,” I say quietly.
“I know,” he repeats, “but I’m sure she’s happy knowing that Thea has you.”
I stare out the window as tears form in my eyes as I think about my sister. “There’s no guidebook for this.”
“Unfortunately, no, there’s not.”
“I feel like I can’t let Thea see me break down, because then she’ll get upset, and I’m trying my hardest, but it’s not easy.”
“Maybe that’s what she needs, Beth Ann,” Charlie says. “Maybe she needs to see that you’re human, too, and you miss Caroline just as much as she does. Even Wonder Woman breaks, after all.”
At his words, the dam inside me crumbles, releasing the full force of my grief and tears all over again.
“Every time she laughs, I see Caroline in her. Her smile, her spirit. It’s just not fair, you know.”
