“I have nae intention of stopping, lass.”
Niall finished his thrust and withdrew as slowly as he had entered, until he was nearly separate from her. Annie made a mewling sound in her throat and wrapped her legs around his hips to keep him in place. “Doona…nae yet…”
Niall laughed. “I am nae going anywhere, lass.”
Annie nearly cried in relief as he filled her again. She hadn’t known her body could actually ache for such a thing. But it did. Every nerve ending felt like it was on fire as Niall kept his thrusts slow and even, teasing her by nearly leaving and then coming together again. She began to writhe beneath him, wanting…more. But Niall continued to tease, alternating now between his slow, easy rhythm and moving harder and faster, which just made her want…more. Much more. Annie’s hands grabbed Niall’s shoulders, her nails raking across his back as her body began to undulate in earnest. Heat seared through her, the flames spreading through her veins like molten lava. Sound faded and her sight dimmed, her only concentration on the joining of their bodies. She had no idea where hers ended and Niall’s began. There was only…sensation beyond belief. And then, just as she began to float on air, a final hard thrust came, butting against her womb and she erupted like a long dormant volcano.
It took several minutes before Annie could actually claim her arms and legs again. She felt boneless—even the effort of moving seemed too much. Niall had rolled off her but kept an arm looped over her stomach. She finally managed to turn her head to find him propped on his other elbow, watching her intensely.
“I…that was…wonderful,” Annie said, thinking how inane and inept those words were, but she had nothing else to describe their coupling.
“Aye, ’twas,” Niall answered and pushed wet strands of her hair away from her face. “And ’tis what we can enjoy every night once we are married.”
Married. Reality returned like a cold dose of ice water from a burn. He was still insisting they get married. No doubt he thought that what had just taken place would persuade her to say yes. Maybe he had evenplannedto seduce her into it. Lord knew the man was good at what he did. Annie closed her eyes. For most women, this would be enough. A man who made wonderful love to herandwanted to protect her.
But she didn’t want protection. Or maybe shedid—she couldn’t deny that being rescued a time or two had saved her from harm—but she didn’t want a man to marry her out of a sense of duty or responsibility. And she knew now that Highlanders had a strong sense of honor. She’d not only seen it in Niall, but also from his brothers and Ian MacLeod and even Owen MacLean. They would all fight in a flash to protect a woman. It was in their blood. It was what they did. That didn’t mean they loved any of those women—other than Ian and Jillian, obviously.
Niall had never said he loved her. The word had not even come up when he proposed marriage. He hadn’t even actually asked her if she would become his wife. He’d simply presented the idea as a good arrangement so he would have the legal right to protect her according to English law. Honor. Duty. Responsibility. Not love.
Love was the only reason she would even consider giving up her freedom for marriage. But her pride could not let her tell Niall that. If she did, he’d simply say the words to make her feel better. He wouldn’tmeanthem. Love was not something someone could ask for. It had to be given freely without pressure. She knew because she loved Niall with all her heart. But she could not marry him knowing he might never feel the same way. Better to let him think a career was more important to her. She took a deep breath and pulled the sheet up.
“I have nae changed my mind.”
Niall frowned. “What?”
“I have nae changed my mind.”
“Ye doona have to repeat it.” Niall sat up and stared down at her. “After what we just did…ye cannae tell me ye did nae enjoy it.”
Annie sat up too, careful to keep the sheet in place. “I did enjoy it. ’Twas heaven.”
“Then why—”
“Because coupling is nae…” Annie stopped, horrified she’d almost saidlove. “…I mean, bed sport is fun, but ’tis a common reaction between men and women, nae?” It was a lie on her part, but she didn’t give Niall a chance to answer, just quickly added a second one. “I want to stay an independent woman. I will find another job.”
“Doona be ridiculous. I can help—”
“I ken ye can help,” Annie answered. “But the answer is the same. I will nae marry ye.”
Niall stared at her for a moment longer, then rolled off the bed and grabbed his clothes. Pulling on his trews, he headed for the door and opened it before he turned around. “Just so ye ken, what happened between us is nae acommonreaction.”
And then he was gone.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Annie woke before dawn and threw the covers back, ignoring the cold floor on her bare feet and the chill in the air because the fire in the brazier had gone completely out. She made hasty work of her ablutions in the near icy water left in the basin and donned her clothes just as the first streaks of pale lavender were lighting the dark sky.
Was Niall still here or had he left in the night?
It had taken only a moment to pull the nightshirt over her head last evening, but by the time she’d gotten to the door, Niall had disappeared. She’d contemplated getting dressed and going down to the public room where he was probably having ale, but reconsidered when she heard the raucous laughter drifting up the stairs. Most of those men would already be in their cups and, if Niall wasn’t there, she would become the target of lewd remarks and lecherous looks and maybe even worse. She certainly didn’t need Niall to rescue her once again. Rationalizing that perhaps he needed some time to think about and understand what she’d said, she’d retreated back to bed, waiting for him to return.
Only he hadn’t.
She opened the door and poked her head out. All was quiet and the other doors in the hall were all closed. Was Niall behind one of them? She couldn’t very well start knocking, though. Her stomach rumbled, reminding her that she hadn’t eaten much of the dinner last night because she was too nervous about Niall’s reaction to finding out she wasn’t an innocent, modest maiden.
That thought made her smile. She was much too opinionated and outspoken to be thought modest. Her worldly views and strange ideas about women’s independence weren’t at all conventional either. But, more to the point, Niall hadn’t beenupset that she’d given away her virtue. If only she thought he actually loved her…
Annie pushed away that fantasy. It had become all too obvious when Niall hadn’t returned to the room that he didn’t. Well. She was wasting time wool-gathering. If Niall hadn’t already left, she might be able to catch him if she waited in the public room. They needed to talk.
