“He’s ... he’s just some guy in my psych class.” I pause as I process what she’s said. “Wait, how do you know his name?”
“Seriously? Honey, I know you aren’t an online social butterfly, but really? Esben Baylor!” She flops back in her chair, clearly exasperated with me but still smiling. “This is what you get for being so out of it.”
“No, I really do not know who he is,” I say impatiently. Now is not the time to scold me for my failure to be on top of Internet trends. “So, who is he? And why do you know about him?”
“I assumed that even you would know who Esben is. I mean, hello? He posts tons of stuff online. Twitter, Facebook, he’s got a live blog...” She waves a hand around. “He’s all over the place. And plenty of other sites pick up his posts. Esben ‘Hottie’ Baylor does videos, pictures, starts hashtag trends. Stuff like that. Bios of interesting people he meets, things that help people, posts that raise awareness of issues. All really touching, feel-good stuff. And now you’re in one of his videos! God, I’m so jealous I could lose my mind, but I’m also totally excited for you! This is the best thing ever!”
“Okay. Okay, it’s fine. This will be fine.” I try to calm myself down. Maybe this isn’t so bad. Maybe it won’t be a problem. It’s just a dumb video.
“He’s got a huge following.” Her beaming smile is beginning to really irritate me. “Like,massive.”
I prop my elbow on the table and drop my head into my hand. “Awesome.”
“What are you so upset about? You made out with Esben Baylor! The only thing to worry about is all the girls who are going to hate you for this.”
“Again, awesome.” I close the browser window.
“Itisawesome,” she insists, but her voice is gentler now. “Allison, this is all very cool. You needed a little spice, don’t you think? Something to mix things up?”
“No, I did not.” I pout. “Listen, I gotta go. I’ll call you tomorrow.”
“You didn’t even watch the whole video. Your scene is amaz—”
I stop her. “I don’t want to watch it. I don’t want to talk about this again, okay?”
“But everyone else is talking about it! People love it, and—”
“Steff, please!” I beg. “Everyone will forget about it soon enough. This is not going to be a big deal, okay? I won’t let it. I don’t need this right now.”
“Well...all right.” Her disappointment is palpable. “You just looked so...different in the video. So...so...”
I sigh. “So what?”
“Open. Real. Emotional.” She casts an undeniably sweet energy. “Vulnerable and so connected.”
“I wasn’t any of those things.” This is a lie, but I’m going to hold to it.
“And in case you didn’t notice, Esben is gorgeous. Like, supergorgeous. Hot. Breathtakingly handsome. And he goddamn flung himself at you! I have never seen anything more romantic in my life, and neither has the rest of the Internet. He’s a heartbreaker, for sure.”
“He is not!” I shout defiantly.
“He is.” She is calm now. “And more than that, Allison? Esben is as perfect as anyone gets. That boy has heart like I’ve never seen.”
“How nice for him. I don’t care.”
She glares at me, and I look away when she says, “You were glowing.”
“I was absolutely not glowing!”
“Honey, who cares if you were? You looked beautiful. And passionate.”
“Seriously, stop it. It was nothing.” I’m so over talking about this mess, and I can’t stay in this conversation any longer—even with Steffi. “I love you, but I’ve got to go. I’ll talk to you soon.” Without giving her a chance to say anything else, I end the video call.
I turn off my computer, throw on pajamas, hit the lights, and get into bed. I don’t care that I haven’t brushed my teeth or that I totally need to pee. There is no way that I’m leaving this room to go down the hall to the bathroom. Who knows who I might run into? What if Steffi is right and some girl accosts me for...for the...
I scream into my pillow.
For the kiss.
