He frowned. “I have not mocked you, Kitty. Do you think I’m blind to my grandfather’s flaws? Or Charlotte’s?”
“We’ve scarcely talked about such matters, and yet here we are, married,” I admitted. “I have not had a free moment to even ask how your grandfather reacted to Edward’s discovery at Limehouse.”
Sebastian leaned against the bedpost, his expression unreadable—leaving me to wonder at the conversation held behind closed doors. “He lays the blame solely at Lord Chudley’s feet.”
“You said Lord Sinclair is a man of discipline. Will he not seek to get to the bottom of the matter? I scarcely think Lord Chudley is the mastermind behind so much smuggling.”
When I rose from the chair, I felt the weight of Sebastian’s attention—the way he stared at my unbound hair and my peignoir—the heat in his gaze bringing a shiver to me, reminding me of that tiny cabin room we shared together, but I was far too angry to be pleased. “Do you believe him over Edward?”
Sebastian folded his arms across his chest. “No, not necessarily,” he admitted. “My grandfather wants more proof. He believes someone might be trying to impersonate a representative of the East India Company, and I think that is a reasonable concern.”
I stepped closer, my voice firm. “Don’t let him brush those crates aside, Sebastian. Whatever is in them—it is important. Edward risked his life.”
His mouth firmed into a hard line.
“And as for my mother, I cannot let your family hold me back from my search. You promised I would be able to seek her. Now I am told, no differently than a child, that I must stay within this house.”
“Kitty, traveling from Calcutta to the court of Hyderabad isn’t a simple trip from Seven Oakes to London. It means crossing principalities, Company territory, and jungle passes—weeks, if not months, of difficult terrain. Malaria lingers in the lowlands. And bandits prey on travelerslong before they reach the Deccan. It’s not a journey to undertake lightly.”
I sucked in a breath through my teeth as I began to pace the room. “Surely escorts can be hired.”
“No,” he said flatly.
I stood toe to toe with him, breathing hard—so many accusations roiling within me, waiting to be unleashed. “Are you no different from my grandfather?”
Sebastian reared back as if I had slapped him. “Katherine, your tongue could shred a man.”
Not Kitty, but Katherine.
“Then prove to me otherwise,” I answered, blinking traitorous tears back.
“You could be kidnapped or far worse,” he rasped as he raised a hand to touch unruly curls. “I agreed you should search for her, but I never intended to send you recklessly into harm’s way. If word gets out that a princess travels along the road to Hyderabad, I cannot protect you.”
He was a singular opponent when crossed. Anger, I could handle. Tenderness? I found myself wavering when he reached out again to touch that curl dangling near my cheek.
I had not backed down in the past, and I refused to do so now.
“I don’t want to be safe, Sebastian. I’ve been hidden at Seven Oakes my whole life, and now here? Must I cower in Calcutta as well, forced to live within your family’s home without a place I can call my own?”
We no longer had a cabin to hold us confined, nor seasickness. Instead, we had two separate rooms with an adjoining door.
“Allow my grandfather to speak on your behalf. He will send inquiries for you,” Sebastian replied.
Would Lord Sinclair do so? I had no assurances from him. I rubbed my arms, suddenly chilled. There was no thrill in sparring with Sebastian. Would his family exert control over him, just as mine had?
“I do not trust your family, not after tonight.” Tears finally spilled from my eyes. This was not our first argument, but somehow it hurt more than anything I had experienced as of yet.
His eyebrows lowered into a frown as I waited for him to act. Anger simmered within me. What did I want him to do, exactly? Snatch me in his arms and press his mouth against mine? Reassure me that all would be well?
He hesitated as he studied my face, his hand falling back to his side. “Good night, Kitty.”
After the door clicked shut behind him, I sat back at the dressing table and stared at my reflection again. The woman in the mirror, with her long, dark hair and wide eyes, still appeared a stranger—caught between two worlds, unsure where she belonged.
29:Kitty
To belong to Jesus is to embrace the nations with Him.
WILLIAM CAREY
