Ezra laughed, a hollow sound.
“I see you saw the video,” he said. “Did you like it? I thought it was pretty brilliant. Everyone knows you’re a hero now.”
“This isn’t a joke, Ez,” I said, my throat constricting.
“I’m not joking,” Ezra said matter-of-factly. “I’m a coward, Jo. I couldn’t tell you how I felt for years. When you were hurting, it took me way too long to figure out how to help you. This is the bravest thing I’ve ever done.”
“The dumbest too,” I said. I thought I had no more tears to cry, but there they were, flowing down my face.
“Theseconddumbest, at least.” When I didn’t laugh, his voice softened. “Just so you know. I’m leaving the country. Just to get my head together. And to escape my mother, who is probably contemplating my murder right now. I’m going to be intentionally hard to reach. But I want you to know that I’m okay, or atthe very least, I will be. If you’re worried about my safety, I’ve got other people keeping tabs on me. I don’t need you to take care of me anymore.”
“I will always take care of you,” I said, hysterical. “Do you understand? I saved your life, Ezra Adelman. Itbelongs to me. You don’t get to decide what to do with it by yourself—”
“Of course I do,” Ezra said. “And I should have realized that sooner.” He paused, took a deep breath. “I love you, Jo. That hasn’t changed. Probably won’t change. But I’ll do my best to love you in the way you want. Though, um, tell your boyfriend to be good to you. Because if he fucks up, Iwillprovide a shoulder to cry on.”
“I won’t give you the opportunity,” Mal said from across the table, finally breaking his silence.
Ezra laughed, and then he hung up, and when I tried to call him back, his phone went straight to voicemail. A second later, my phone buzzed with a text:Careful, Jo. Call me again and I’ll think you’re flirting with me.Followed by:Seriously. I’m putting you on mute though. Catch you in a few weeks, by which point I hope to be over you too.
I stared at the screen, stunned, until a hand covered mine, Mal’s, lowering my phone back onto the table.
“I’m not sorry,” he said solemnly, not breaking my gaze. “I know you’re upset, but I won’t apologize.”
“I didn’t need you to save me,” I said. “I can handle myself. I’vebeenhandling myself, before you showed up.”
“We know that,” Mal said, and it was strange to hear him refer to a “we” that wasn’t him and me, but him and Ezra. “But Ezra wanted to do everything he could, and I agreed that was the right course of action. I didn’t know that he was going to dothis, honestly. But even if I did, I wouldn’t have stopped him.”
“I didn’t ask for this,” I said through a tightening throat. Not even an hour ago, I’d imagined picking out another movie to watch, maybe taking Mal up on his invitation to put me through one of his more punishing workout circuits, or perhaps even inviting him back into my bed. Now I couldn’t even bring myself to touch him. I squeezed my eyes shut. “I think you need to leave.”
Mal seemed to sense my hesitation, and, to my relief, he didn’t fight me. I was tired of fighting.
“Take whatever time you need,” he said, and even his consideration managed to piss me off. “I’ll be waiting. You know where to find me.”
A romance writer through and through, I thought. I nodded, then turned tail, feeling miserably that the spell we’d woven together had already been broken.
Interstitial
IN TOUCH:Knydus Heir Confesses to Funding Heroin- and Cocaine-Fueled “Ragers” at Elite Private University in Shocking Video
TMZ:In Depression Awareness Month Post, One True Kiss Star Talks Suicide and Salvation
BUSTLE.COM, ASHLEY BIERNACKI:Accepting that I was the villain in Josephine Boateng’s story required taking a hard look at myself—
merecedes_johnson:the rich white kids are always on the hardest drugs. Saw it in my college too. They throw black boys in jail for a bit of weed, but hamilton bartholemew the third could be snorting lines on the dean’s desk and they’ll be talking about his potential.
pilatesrn:i was an EMT in college too. Mostly got drunk kids but I was always so scared of a situation like that one. Bravo @drjojobee
futuredoctorwilson:i’ve actually met @drjojobee before. She’s super sweet. A lot less scary than she seems online
beyoncesgivenchydress:@futuredoctorwilson y’all really need to stop calling every confident Black woman you see scary
@futuredoctorwilson:No, i didn’t mean it like that
@futuredoctorwilson:She’s just really nice
@futuredoctorwilson:I’m sorry. I may be white, but i’m committed to self-examination and even went to the BLM protests in my city. I’m always trying to learn.
xX_liliana_Xx:click on my profile to have a fun time;)
