“It’s not the same, Sebastien. Do you really think I’d do that?”
“No,” he replied simply. “You would never. What’s surprising to me is that your father thinks you would. It’s like he doesn’t know you at all.”
Rose grimaced, thinking of what Clotaire knew about her that she didn’t dare reveal. “I’d rather not refer to him as my father anymore. I’m struggling to understand Clotaire. All of this has turned my world upside down, but one thing I’m coming to terms with is that he never really loved me or truly saw me as a person, for a variety of reasons. As you always said, I was a doll to him, to dress up and bejewel, a vehicle for his ambition, and so is Thorn, in her role. I don’t think either of us truly exist as actual people for him.”
“I’m sorry. That must be very difficult for you,” Sebastien said, studying her and absently stroking Bunny’s ears. Thescáthcúhad wandered back over to lean his chin on Sebastien’s knee, Nonna on the other side, just as had been Nina and Nonna’s habit. The sight both hurt her heart and pleased it.
She nodded, feeling stiff and remote, tangling her fingers in her skirts. “I’m coping.”
He smiled, almost ruefully. “You always do. It’s one of the things I most admire about you.”
Rose kind of smiled back, feeling mostly pained. Yes, she always coped, and no one worried about her.
“And Clotaire plans to take Thorn from one cozy prison to another, using her like livestock,” Sebastien commented almost idly, but Rose could hear the simmering rage beneath. And the passionate feelings he bore for her sister that he could never feel for her.
“How is Thorn?” she asked. She had been unkind in her anger and personal tumult. Probably she should have gone to see her twin and tell her all of this already.
“She is… coping,” he answered. “I mean, she’s holding up, though it’s also hard for her. You’ve met her. She’s scarred andlonely. I only wanted to break her free of the cottage and Jada’s grip.”
“Was Jada there?”
“No, but I was worried she’d return and punish Thorn. She did the most horrible things to her, all these years.”
“I know.”
“So, you talked to Thorn.” He ventured it almost as a question. “I wasn’t sure how you would have reacted to discovering her existence. I worried that you—”
He broke off and Rose raised her brows, hurt and offended in one. “What?” she demanded. “You worried that I’d been unkind to her? That I wouldn’t take the time to listen my own sister’s story, that I wouldn’t sympathize with her, after all she’s suffered and the way she’s been terrorized while I lived like a queen, single-mindedly pursuing my ambitions? Ambitions, by the way, that I’ve discovered aren’t really mine at all but meticulously planted and nurtured in me my entire life by a man who seeks only to use me? You thought I wouldn’t look at Thorn and know that, but for a twist of chance, her fate could have been mine? That I wouldn’t feel guilty and terrible and broken and that I haven’t been seeking every possible path to do what’s best for Thorn, knowing I can never ever make any of it up to her?” She finished on a ragged breath, one that in a human might have been close to a sob.
To his credit, Sebastien looked abashed, but he also nodded. “You’re right. I should have known you’d be good to her. I’m not thinking straight. I know it seems crazy and sudden but… I might be in love with her.” He met her gaze steadily, no caginess in his eyes, no courtly charm or seductive deflection. Simple, raw honesty.
“It’s sudden, but not crazy,” she told him. “She’s suited to you. You know, she found your belt buckle a long time ago and…” She trailed off because he was nodding.
“She told me. And, bizarrely enough, I found one of her chickens.”
“Her chickens,” Rose repeated blankly.
“Esmerelda.”
“Esmerelda?”
“A fancy name for a chicken, I agree, but she’s a fancy chicken.” He said it with a straight face, but his lips twitched. A chuckle escaped. “Thorn names all of her chickens.”
Rose burst out laughing. “Of course she does,” she gasped out, collapsing in the other chair. Nonna came over for exclusive ear-rubbing, and Rose obliged. “I don’t know why that was so funny.”
“It’s laugh or cry,” Sebastien said on a sigh, holding out his hand. They linked fingers loosely, as was sometimes their habit.
She still liked his touch. Sebastien, her friend.
“I don’t know what to do, Rose.”
“I think I do. I’m still working out the details, but… Maybe you should marry Thorn instead of me.”
He gave her a startled look. “For real?”
“Yes.” She nearly laughed again. “If she feels about you the way I think she might, then you two could get married, for real. I know you haven’t known each other long, but…”
“But you and I haven’t known each other for more than a few months and I proposed to you. Time is pressing us.” He looked thoughtful. “I wonder if she’d say yes?”
