“I’m sorry.” She flushed, not meeting his eyes.
He restrained himself from telling her not to apologize. Instead, he held her hands and her gaze. “We’re still new, still learning to talk with one another. We’ll sort things out.”
Her luminous dark eyes met his at last and she nodded, chewing on her lip in that endearing way. He wanted to go back to kissing those sweet lips, plumbing that delicious mouth, until she was senseless and melting in his arms. It must be part and parcel of her artlessness, but he’d never known a woman to give herself over as utterly and without reserve or calculation as Lily.But they needed to have this conversation. “My one story for the day and then you’ll tell me yours. Then we can decide if we want to continue making love or have a snack, all right?”
Her stomach rumbled audibly at the mention and he raised his brows at her. “Maybe we should have a snack now, while we talk?”
Biting her lower lip in embarrassment, she nodded. “I am a little hungry.”
“I do love a snack,” he teased her. “All right, but I’ll help.”
Together they fetched an array of food from the incredible feast she’d laid out in the kitchen. Hard to believe she’d made all of that. Sebastien insisted on carrying the platter back to the rug in the library despite her protests. Sitting across from him, she regarded him with an oddly rapt expression. He cocked his head at her, spreading blackberry jam on a scone. “What are you thinking?”
She blushed and averted her eyes. “Just how much I like you.”
“I like you, too,” he replied with a smile, and popped the scone in his mouth. The pastry melted like butter and the jam exploded with flavor, bursting with the juices of a hot summer afternoon. “And this might be the best thing I’ve ever tasted in my entire life.”
She flushed bright red and laughed. “I doubt my scones compete with those at the palace.”
He thought ruefully of the food made for hundreds of people at once, even the diligent castle kitchen staff strained to cook in such quantities. “You’ll see. All right, no more delaying. I need to tell you this story.” He took a deep breath. “So, yes, I did have many lovers at court, from the time I was about fourteen.” He said that in a rush. Rose knew some of this, but mostly he hadn’t had to explain to her. She knew how things worked and had simply given him sympathy and understanding. He wasn’t at all sure how Lily would take this.
“Isn’t that very young?” she asked tentatively.
Tempted to laugh, knowing it would come out bitter, he held it back. “My first lover was a duchess from an allied kingdom. When she invited me to her bed, I had no idea what to do—or really even what was about to happen.”
She frowned. “Is that… normal?”
He couldn’t help laughing a little, raking his hair back from his forehead. “What is normal? Court life is predicated on power, which allows you to take what you want. The duchess wanted me and she plucked me like a choice partridge from the platter before anyone else could.”
“That sounds unsavory.”
“Well, if it hadn’t been her, it would have been someone else.” The old pain, the look of sympathy on Lily’s face, the intimacy of sitting on the rug with her in the firelight all combined to make him surprisingly emotional about it all. “The duchess was generous with me, which is another way of exerting and sharing power. I didn’t have any, so that was my one avenue to get what I needed, for me and for my sisters, who took care of me.”
“But you’re a prince, and a sorcerer!”
A glossy strand of black hair had fallen into her face and he tucked it behind her ear, taking the opportunity to stroke the velvet softness of her cheek. He couldn’t seem to get enough of touching her. “I’m not much of a sorcerer, sweet—nothing like you are, even untutored—and power is relative. If someone, or many someones, have more power than you do, then they can give or take away.” He was in danger of becoming maudlin, which he didn’t want for their first night together. “Anyway, after the duchess came a countess, then a diplomat’s wife, then a foreign princess… The list goes on. Some were kinder than others, but I’ve lost count of how many there were. So that’s my long answer to your question. That’s why I’ve had so many lovers.”
“I’m sorry, Sebastien.”
He believed she was, with her earnest compassion andheartfelt empathy. “Thank you,” he replied gravely. “Ready to tell me your one story—why your room is so bare?”
The image of that tiny, almost sterile room stuck with him as Lily told him about her attempt to break through the wards and how Jada had mocked her romantic longings and burned her journals, ripping every supposed “privilege” from her charge. He did his best to keep a calm demeanor, but he thought that if Jada walked into the room at that moment, he might tear out her throat with his bare hands. Lily wept quietly as she told the tale and he held her hands, wishing he could go back in time and take her away. If it was true that Moriah had manipulated circumstances so that he and Lily met, then it was inexcusable she didn’t help Lily sooner.
The cat didn’t know then,Bunny said.And the world had not yet turned so that the pieces fell into place.
Eavesdropping on my thoughts?
You think very loudly.
Sebastien decided to ignore that remark.What does that mean—the pieces of what hadn’t fallen into place?
The plan thing.
The plan thing?
Yes. The plan thing.
Sebastien struggled with impatient exasperation.What is the plan thing?
