“That one’s yours.”
“Me?” I blink up in surprise. “An oak leaf? That’s cool.”
“You recognize it as oak? Dude!” He slaps my shoulder and then winces like he’s afraid he’s hurt me. I wave him off and he looks back down at it. “Yeah. I got this one on your twentieth birthday. Oak is a symbol of strength, and you’ve always been that for me.”
I swallow, unsure what to say to this, finally settling on, “Based on what Em’s told me, it sounds like we’ve both been strength for each other.”
As soon as I say it, it feels like too much. But thankfully there’s something about Crash that doesn’t let the moment turn weird. “Fuck yeah, we have” is all he says, and then grins. “It’s wild,” he continues, leaning in to look more closely at me. “You stilllooklike Luca.”
“I am still Luca,” I tell him. “Just… no backstory. Yet.”
“But, as far as you know, everything else is working?” he asks, eyebrows raised meaningfully.
And I guess this is something we’d talk about without weirdness, too. I have no idea if I’ve ever blushed near him, but I feel the tips of my ears get hot.
“Oh shit!” Crash says, reaching out to slap my shoulder again. “Can’t say I blame you, dude. Em is hot.” Laughing, he leans back into the couch. “Should I recount your past for you?”
“I presume you mean women I’ve dated.” He nods, and I shake my head. “I’m good. Working to remember that one for now.” I hook my thumb behind me toward the kitchen.
“Man. The ways I could fuck around with you.”
“Believe me, I’m aware.”
Honey looks up at me from where she’s sitting on the floor. When I pat the sofa at my side, she climbs carefully onto the couch and rests her head in my lap.
“I wouldn’t, though,” Crash says, reaching out to scratch the back of Honey’s neck. I get the sense that he can be a lot, but there’s a gentleness about him that already has me at ease. I can see why we’ve been friends for so long. I already like him. “I mean, at least not until you’re feeling a bit more like yourself. Then all bets are off.”
“Appreciated.”
“Bet it was wild to find out you’re married to a hot scientist.”
I laugh, nodding. “Definitely.” And then I remember how he reacted realizing Emery was home during the day. “Why was it such a surprise to see her here?”
Crash reaches up, scrubbing a hand over his jaw. “She works a lot. That’s all.”
I try to translate his tone. “Is it a thing?”
“Yeah.” He tilts his head back and forth and winces. “No? I don’t know, man… I don’t really want to—”
Cutting in, I say, “Nah, don’t worry about it. Just trying to figure out the dynamics of everything. We’ve talked a little and I get the sense there were some things we needed to work on. Just wondering, you know, if we were happy?”
Crash pauses, looking out the window for a few beats. “You two can barely keep your hands off each other,” he says. “But I’m guessing you know that.”
I have zero trouble believing him—I have no idea what my type is, but I’d wager it’s Emery to a T—but it still feels like there’s something he isn’t saying. It makes me feel strangely uneasy. “All right, well, that’s good to know.”
“Dude, this is wild,” he says, shaking his head, and then he pauses, setting his hand on my shoulder. “And take a couple weeks. Or whatever you need, okay?”
“Don’t we have a landscaping business to run? I mean, even if I don’t remember things, I’d like to get back to work when I can.”
Crash lifts his chin, gesturing to my leg. “Canyou work now?”
I grimace. It hurts, but not nearly as much as it probably should. “Not yet. But hopefully soon?”
He waves this off. “I can handle it for a couple of weeks. Anyway, what if your memories never come back? Wouldn’t you want to figure out if you’re going to stay with her?”
This surprises me into silence because, frankly, neither of these things had occurred to me—that I wouldn’t eventually remember, or that Emery and I wouldn’t stay together. I asked her what she wanted out of all this, but I haven’t really thought about whatIwant.
I reach up, rubbing my hands over my face in frustration. I have about a million questions, but no context to even begin to form them. I suppose it’s good that Emery and Annie choose this moment to return to the living room.
