She had meant it to be a joke, but for some reason, it made her think about Zane, made her face heat up. She tried to force herself to think about Jackson. Why not have casual sex withhim? He seemed like a bike with training wheels. Which was exactly what she needed.
That wasn’t a very flattering thing to think about a man, but he didn’t have to know that she thought it.
She had never been waiting for the one, that was the thing. It had just been life, persistently getting in the way of her meeting that milestone.
“I mean, if you want to,” Marlowe said. “But I have to tell you, my best attempt at that didn’t end very casually.”
“Okay. Cautionary tale. If I don’t do it right, I might end up with a gorgeous, hopelessly in love cowboy who devotes his every waking moment to my happiness. I will be careful.”
Marlowe laughed. “Yes. Deeply cautionary.”
Cara might enjoy being a cautionary tale. She had never really been much of anything. There was no lore or legends about her.
She was the kind of story that someone would tell their kids to put them to sleep. She was safe for the whole family.
Very depressing.
Very, very depressing.
“I guess I should devote myself to my knitting. Maybe seriously binge-watching this season of my favorite detective show.”
“What’s the show?”
“Well, it’s all these murders in this little British village.”
“How many murders can happen in a small British village?”
“You’d be surprised. I think it might be something in the tea.”
“Maybe I’ll join you.”
For today at least, Cara had something to distract her.
It might not fix anything. But she would take the Band-Aid.
Maybe this was part of letting herself heal.
Chapter Six
“Hey ZB, did you want a ribeye or a flank steak?”
“Ribeye,” Zane grunted. “What kind of question is that?”
“Greedy,” Lila commented, pushing over to where Zane was standing by the barbecue. “I’ll just take a strip, Cody.”
“That’s just because you don’t have discerning taste,” Nolan said. “All taste the same to you.” He reached out and ruffled Lila’s hair, like she was a small child or a pet, and she rounded on him, teeth bared.
They never knew what to do when he was in the middle of this sort of thing, and years of it hadn’t helped him figure it out.
It was so… Familiar.
He could remember times like that, but it had been so long since he had been a part of a family unit that they felt like half-member daydreams.
He could remember chasing his brother around the house, threatening to kill him for daring to breathe toward his gaming system, and he could remember beating him with a pillow when he caught him.
But it brought things up to the surface every single time hewas in the middle of this, and he wondered if that would ever change. If it would ever fade.
The only way to really let all that fade away was to be alone.
