When his gaze catches mine, I can’t look away. I wait for him to wink or crack a joke to lighten the moment, but he doesn’t. My heart is thudding so loud in my chest, I’m surprised he can’t hear it. The tension makes my mouth feel dry, and when I lick my lips out of habit, Ronin’s eyes flick down, and his part slightly.
“Mel,” he whispers, still staring at my mouth.
“Ronin,” I whisper back. The firelight flickers in the reflection of his glasses.
His hand twitches, like he’s about to reach out for me but decides against it. His fingers tighten on the armrest of his chair, and he finally breaks his stare. He takes a swig of his beer before setting it down into the cup holder.
I let loose a breath, taking another sipof my own drink.
“It’s pretty late,” Ronin says, breaking the brief silence between us. “Do you want to go to bed?”
He still won’t look at me as he stands up to put out the small remainder of our fire.
I clear my throat. “Yes,” I say, my voice hoarse. “I’m ready for bed.”
I stand to help him clear away our empty bottles and cans and put away the trash. When everything has been cleaned up, we turn to face each other.
Why is this suddenly the most awkward moment of my life? It’sRonin.I need to fucking chill.
Yes, but it’sRonin, my brain tells me.Your best friend that you’re incredibly attracted to, in case you forgot.
I haven’t forgotten.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
MELLIE
Ronin ducks into the tent to prepare our bedding. I wipe my hands on my sweatpants, trying not to overthink what’s about to happen. It’s just sleeping. Right?
He pops his head out and gestures for me to come inside. “All good,” he says, holding out a hand.
This feels incredibly intimate. I take his hand and let him lead me inside the tent. Ronin has a couple of thick blankets laid out across the ground and two sleeping bags with pillows side by side over the top. I let go of his hand and collapse down onto the closest one, then kick my shoes into the corner of the tent. As Ronin gets into his sleeping bag, I rummage through my backpack and pull out a thick pair of socks to roll them over the ones I’m already wearing. My feet are bound to be freezing sleeping on the cold ground.
I tuck my legs into my sleeping bag and lay down, turning my head to Ronin who’s staring at the roof of the tent. His glasses and beanie are off, placed to the side of his bedding. My hands ache to run my fingers through his hair splayed out across his pillow. I grip the blanket tightly to distract myself.
“Well, goodnight,” I say quietly.
Ronin turns his head toward me, his eyes gleaming in the lowlight. He reaches over to dim the lantern that sits above him, lowering it until the tent is pitched into darkness. “Goodnight, Mel.”
We lay there in silence, my heart pounding so loudly, I can feel my pulse in my ears. I am literally never going to be able to fall asleep like this. Closing my eyes, I burrow deeper into my blankets and try to relax only to eventually start shivering from the coldness seeping in from the ground.
Sensing Ronin turn to me in the darkness, I open my eyes, looking at him.
“Are you okay?” he asks. “You’re shaking.”
“Yeah,” I say, my teeth chattering slightly. “I’m just cold. I didn’t expect it to bethiscold.”
Ronin searches my face for a long moment, as if he’s watching something play out in his head. Just as it starts to feel awkward, he suddenly pulls his sleeping bag down his body and rises to his knees.
“Here, sit up,” he instructs. I sit, and he lays his sleeping bag down on the ground over the blankets that are already there. He reaches toward my sleeping bag and pauses. “Is it okay if I unzip yours? We should share, for body warmth.”
I nod, a shiver going through me that doesn’t have anything to do with the cold. Ronin helps me out of the sleeping bag and I lay back down. He settles in next to me and drapes the unzipped bedding over both of us.
“You should turn to your side,” he whispers. “That way I can lay behind you. If that’s okay?”
“Yeah, sure,” I murmur, turning to lay on my left side. Ronin shifts, moving his body to spoon behind mine and wrapping his right arm over me. His hand splays across my stomach, and my muscles tighten in response.
“This okay?” His voice is right in my ear, his breath tickling my neck.
