Needless to say, when we got to the bar, Drea and Cara were both a little drunk and were yelling at each other. Blair tried to diffuse the situation, but it only escalated until Rylee kicked us all out and the yelling continued on the sidewalk.
I quit that night, Cara ended her publishing contract and friendship with Blair, and Drea and Blair broke up. It was a long night for all of us, and I sort of rage quit. All the anger I’d been keeping inside finally spilled over when Drea tried to blame me for her breakup.
Every time we saw each other now, she gave me a big hug and told me she was sorry and appreciated me, and every time I told her it wasn’t necessary but thanked her.
Daisy parked, pulling me from my thoughts and I got out of the car before striding over to hers. She saw me and smiled. “You’re wearing your yoga shorts.” She looked at my shorts, the same ones I’d worn my first time doing yoga in her house. Did she not like them? The way she looked at them was like she wanted to rip them off and throw them in the dumpster.
I frowned and turned around checking out the back. “What’s wrong with them? You don’t think they look good?”
Her gaze landed on my hip, and I just sort of looked at her. What was going on in her head?
Whatever it was, she shook it away before I could ask. “No. That’s not… There’s nothing wrong with them at all. They do look good. Really good. I was just asking. Should we go inside now?”
I stared at her for a moment longer but decided it was best to let it go. I didn’t know what was going on with her, and I wanted to know, but I didn’t want us to be late.
We headed inside and immediately found Drea and Blair on thecourt. They were getting cozy and very close, of course. And I shook my head and smiled at them. They were insatiable sometimes.
“Get a room!” I yelled like the mature adult I was. In reality, I was happy for them and it wasn’t like this was the first time I’d seen them kiss. I’d seen a lot more of Blair’s legs than I ever wanted to.
They broke apart and smiled when they saw us. Blair fixed her lipstick and Drea lightly smacked her on the ass, causing a squeal from Blair. Good lord, those two!
“Kaisy’s here!” Blair shouted from across the court. She ran up to us and gave us a big hug. I turned to scowl at Drea, who was coming up behind her and tried to hide my blush.
I rolled my eyes as they both did the sign for sunshine, lifting their hand near their temple and letting their fingers bloom outward. At some point, they’d decided that was going to be the sign for our names instead of spelling it out. Was it cute? Yes. Was it embarrassing? Also, yes.
“That’s so cute!” Daisy said, tapping me on the shoulder. My blush deepened, and I wanted to throw the ball at Drea.
She was the one who gave us that nickname. Every time we walked in the store together, she’d ask me “How’s Kaisy today?”
We said hello before we split off into teams. Drea and Blair against me and Daisy. I knew we were going to lose. They had been playing for a while, and I had no clue what I was doing. I still wasn’t sure what pickleball even was. It looked like tennis to me.
We served them their first point. After a while, and several points awarded to them, I started to get the hang of it and even scored points of my own. Daisy was a natural, and we won only because of her.
After a few rounds, my mind started drifting to everything that had happened recently. I was still mourning the loss of my father, so I put all my energy into that game. I also started thinking about Daisy, and I might have gotten a little aggressive with my hits.
Daisy in the bathtub, naked and dripping with soapy water. Daisy staring at me without a shirt on. Daisy… taking care of herself in her room, exploring her body as she came apart from her own touch. It was pure torture. Being in the same house as her and not being able to kiss her or touch her was maddening.
She was my best friend. I shouldn’t have those thoughts about her,and yet… it was impossible not to. Being in love with someone you can’t have is something I wouldn’t wish on anyone.
If I tried to find my own person, it would probably get easier, but I wasn’t ready to try dating again. I just had too much going on between dealing with my dad’s house and work at the store. Not to mention my complicated feelings for Daisy. I wished I’d wake up one day and they were just gone. I wanted to love her without being in love with her. If she ever found out, if she ever knew how I felt about her, she’d probably kick me out of her house and drop contact with me.
On my last serve, a scream escaped my throat, and Blair and Drea just looked at me, shocked. I tried to play it off as a normal part of the game, but it sort of sounded like a banshee scream. The tears streaming down my face probably gave me away, too.
“Kaia—” Blair started, but Drea put a hand on her arm, stopping her from asking if I was okay. I wasn’t, and I needed this game to finish so I could take a shower and get back to normal.
“All good,” I said. “I’ll meet you guys after the showers. Daisy, I’ll see you in there?” She nodded with confusion written on her face. “Good game, guys.”
I walked off the court without another word, wiping my tears away and feeling everyone’s eyes on me. What the hell was wrong with me? I was usually so much calmer and I didn’t cry this much unless I was reading.
I stopped just outside the locker room when I felt a tap on my shoulder. Daisy. I turned around to see her standing there, brows furrowed with worry. I hated that. I had to pull it together. I didn’t want her worrying about me. I was fine—I’d be fine. I just needed some space between us. Maybe I’d make an excuse to take a long weekend trip alone somewhere. Just to clear my head.
“Are you okay?” Daisy asked, bringing me back to the present.
Yes. I was fine. I was crying and screaming and basically trying to murder the ball because I was perfectly fine.
“I’m fine.” I plastered on as much of a smile as I could manage and headed for the locker room.
She grabbed my wrist as soon as the door to the locker room closed, stopping me in place as she always did when she touched me. I turnedaround to face her, not wanting to see the question in her eyes. Sometimes I wished she wasn’t so observant. “Stop, Kaia. What’s going on?”
