I grinned. “Thank you. I told you I don’t need an office. There’s plenty of seating out here I can work from. Or your office when Blair’s not here.” I laughed at Blair’s blushing face. Those two were insatiable.
Drea cleared her throat. “Anyway, are you coming to the Christmas party? It’s at my house again.”
I shrugged. “I don’t know. You know parties aren’t my thing.”
“Oh, come on. It’ll be so fun! And you have Daisy now. Bring her along!”
I turned to Daisy and smiled when I caught her looking over at us. She waved and I waved back. But my smile fell when I turned away from her. I didn’t have her, and I never would.
Daisy wasn’t a serial dater, but she had been out a few times since I’d known her. I never asked what she did on those dates. I didn’t want to know. It would never be me on the other side of the dinner table. It would never be me on the other side of the goodnight kiss. Or the morning after at the breakfast table.
Daisy was extremely outgoing. She was always texting with herfriends and talking about their plans. Of course we spent a lot of time together and talked at all hours of the day, and I knew I was her best friend, but I was the complete opposite of her.
Social interactions made me break out into hives. Work was one thing. I wasn’t surrounded by dozens of people trying to have conversations all at once. That was why I’d applied at the bookstore. I loved reading, yeah, but I knew it wouldn’t be like a nightclub or bar. I was sure Daisy wanted someone as outgoing as her.
“Kaia? Are you with us?” Drea asked.
I shook my head. “No. Yeah, of course. Sorry. I’ll think about it, okay?”
Drea rolled her eyes. “You always say that, love. Actually think about it this time, okay?”
I nodded and was grateful she didn’t press it anymore.
“On a more serious note. Kaia, when are you going back home?” Drea’s voice turned soft and nurturing.
Ugh. I’d been thinking about that answer for the last few days. The only thing I came up with was, “I’m not. I’m going to start looking for an apartment. I… I can’t go back there. It was hard enough just going to get a few things; I don’t know how I’ll be when I have to return to clean it out. I don’t want to think about that right now.”
Blair came over and put a comforting arm on my shoulder. “You don’t have to make any decisions. You know you always have us if you need anything. And you know you have Daisy.”
I smiled softly and turned around to see Daisy looking at us with a concerned expression. “Hey. Are you okay?” she asked.
“Drea asked me when I’m going home. I told her I’m not. I’m going to look for an apartment this weekend.”
I wasn’t sure what I said, but Daisy looked a little confused and almost hurt by my words. I didn’t think she wanted me to stay with her forever. “You know you can stay with me, doodle.”
“It’s okay, I’ve stayed long enough. You need your house back.”
She frowned and adjusted her stance to a more defensive one. “How do you know what I need? I’m telling you I don’t mind.”
I blushed. She was so gorgeous when she got bossy with me, but I had to hide those thoughts away.
Drea and Blair were looking between each other before Drea clearedher throat. “I think I hear my office phone ringing. Come on, my love. Help me answer it?” Drea took Blair’s hand and disappeared toward her office. I turned back to Daisy, who was looking at me with her arms crossed like she was annoyed, but the sad expression in her eyes gave her away.
“I appreciate that Daisy, but I can’t. That’s your space.” There was no way I could move in with her. The last week had been torture enough. I could keep my feelings away when I didn’t have to sleep a few feet from her. It was easier when I was in my own bed.
“Kaia, you can. Apartment hunting sucks, and I could use a roommate. I love having you there, and I’d only ask that you pitch in for groceries so you don’t feel like a freeloader.”
I smiled. I would feel that way. This was a terrible idea. The worst idea in history. “I don’t know. What if your parents want to come over? Or your other friends? They wouldn’t have a place to stay. And what happens when you go on a date and want to bring them back? I don’t want you to have to worry if someone else is there or not.”
I knew it was an excuse, but it sounded like a good one. Her parents lived only five minutes from her, and her friends never stayed over. They weren’t the types to get drunk and crash on someone’s couch.
“You know that won’t happen. My parents don’t live far enough to warrant an overnight visit. My friends have never stayed over at my house, and if they do, so what? As far as dates, that isn’t even a discussion right now.” She gave me a look that caused mixed emotions.
She knew something was off and I hated that. But at the same time, she looked so damn cute when she was showing authority. “Kaia, what’s really going on? Is there something wrong with my house, or me? You’re there all the time, and you’re my best friend. Why don’t you want to live together?”
I froze. There was no way I could tell her the truth. Then I really wouldn’t have a place to go. I bit my tongue, trapping the truth inside, and decided to go with a different one instead.
“It’s not that. I’m just… I don’t want to impose on your life and routine. I know how you love your routine, and I don’t want it to become an issue between us. I don’t want you to get sick of me. Forced proximity can change people.”
