“Kingston…” I try one more time to be the voice of reason, but the arguments get lost when his lips meet mine in so much more than the brush from a moment ago.
I’m curled up on the couch watching10 Things I Hate About Youwhen Qi plops down next to me with a bowl of popcorn. He lets out a sigh before picking up the remote and pausing the movie. I’venoticed him giving me sideways glances for a bit now, and I’m hoping he’ll finally open his mouth and tell me what the hell is going on in his brain.
“Qiang, I don’t think he’s good for you,” he says quietly.
I sigh at that because I don’t need him to elaborate onwhohe’s talking about. Qi has not been exactly subtle about not being Team Kingston. I don’t know why Qi so decidedly dislikes him, unless maybe he’s jealous because it’s the first time I’ve ever been in a relationship, and it definitely cuts into our sibling time a bit.
“Qi, he’s not who you think he is.”
He swallows and nods, not looking at all convinced. “I really hope so, but I saw him with a girl earlier, and he looked at her the same way he looks at you. Like you’re a toy, or a pastime. It’s not about what he can give you; it’s about how you stroke his ego,” he says, and I can kind of see where he’s coming from because Kingston is more on guard around Qi like he is with everyone else. They don’t see the sides to him that I see.
“He has to date the girls his dad sets him up with,” I try my best to explain.
He turns, and his dark eyes meet mine with a hint of anger and frustration brewing in them. “He doesn’t have to make out with them in his car, though, does he?”
I swallow hard at that because I knew he was out with her, but I didn’t know he had made out with her; but then again, it’s not the first time it’s happened, nor will it be the last. He doesn’t sleep with them, but he has to play a role, and sometimes he has to act outside himself to convince people of it.
“It’s part of the ruse,” I tell Qi, repeating it in my head to remind myself that Kingston and I have discussed it before.
Qi rolls his eyes at me, then looks away uncomfortably, because it’s not easy for him to talk to me like this. He doesn’t want to hurt my feelings or be wrong, so I know he’s struggling to say what’s on his mind.
“I’m sure it is, but who is the ruse supposed to fool?” he asks, huffing a bit before turning back to face me again. “I just hope that you’re careful with him, Qiang. I don’t want to see you get hurt. That guy gives me bad vibes.”
I reach over and squeeze his arm to reassure him. “Everything is going to work out perfectly, you’ll see,” I’ll tell him.
He doesn’t look convinced at all, but instead of arguing more, he just lets out a heavy sigh and lays his head on my shoulder. It makes something in my tummy flutter uncomfortably because, even though we're as close as we are, Qi isn’t a cuddler very often unless he’s really upset.
I trust Kingston, I really do. But I trust Qi’s instincts too, and he wouldn’t have been this vulnerable and said so much if he didn’t really mean it. But I’m sure it’s because they just don’t know each other well enough yet. They’ll get along better, and Qi will get to know Kingston and trust him as I do.
Kingston lets out an aggravated huff when he tries to pull my chair closer to him, and I immediately pull away.
“Why are you mad at me? You’ve been cold since I got here.”
I bristle at that because part of me knows I should know better, because we’ve talked about this before and I said I could handle it, but the jealousy and distrust with it is eating me up harder than I originally thought it would.
I know it’s my fault, but I can’t help the steady trickle of frustration and unease that’s worked its way in since Qi aired out his sentiments, and I’ve noticed Kingston with that same girl several times over the past couple of weeks.
“Are you fucking her?” I spit out with way more vitriol than was necessary.
Kingston’s face falls, and he reaches up to pinch the bridge of his nose. “Of course, I’m not fucking her.”
“But you keep seeing the same one, and you were seen making out with her. You’ve never stuck with the same one or made out with them before. Well, not since we got together,” I point out, trying to calm the aching beats of my heart.
Kingston sighs and flops back deeper into his chair. “Dad arranged it. Her dad is one of his business partners, and our ability to get along the way he wants us to is being monitored. If I don’t play the part, he’ll know something’s up, and he’ll hurt you if he finds out about you, baby. I’m not fucking her, but I have to convince her just as well as him.”
I swallow hard at that and nod. Not cheating, notyet, but it’s coming,andI’llbe the mistress, not her. I don’t know if I can do that. To be kept as the dirty secret, especially if his dad pushes for a more permanent relationship between them. Tears well in my eyes because no matter how much I want him, I don’t think I can be that person.
“I love you so much, Kingston, and I really want this to work between us, but how is there any future for us like this?”
Kingston’s eyes fly to mine, and he leans forward to pull me against him. His arms wrap around me, and I curl into the crook of his neck. His steady heartbeat keeps me from breaking apart.
“I just need time to get things in order, and then I can get out from under his thumb, and we can be together, baby. I know it’s a lot to ask, and I don’t deserve you at all–”
His voice was warm and soothing in my ear until I heard the last bit. He’s always downplaying his worth, and he should never doubt that.
“No, don’t say that. We’ll figure it out. I can wait for you.”
His eyes light up with hope, and he gives me a dazzling smile. “You won’t have to wait forever, just a little longer, and we’ll be free,” he promises before kissing my doubts away.
