John’s face was red by now, and his toothless mouth was wide open. He trembled with strong emotions, emotions that were far too big for his little body. Every cry brought a sense of shame to Lydia, causing her to feel as though she wasn’t enough for him.
“Perhaps I can still try to calm him,” Georgia suggested, but Lydia shook her head. She wanted to do this by herself, and so Georgia left the room. However, Lydia itched because of Victor’s judgmental gaze. She could feel it upon her, thinking that she was silly and foolish and just a girl trying to be a woman.
The crying grew louder and louder until it seemed to fill the whole room. It shot through Lydia’s mind, leaving her frazzled. The sound was everywhere. It was suffocating and crushing, and it didn’t seem like it was ever going to end.
Was it truly possible for a baby to cry forever?
What if the wailing never stopped?
What if he hated her?
Then, Victor strode forward and stood in front of Lydia, impeding her path. She turned her head away, thinking that he was about to have some strong words for her. Instead, he directed his words at John.
“Now listen here young man, this will not do. This is not the proper way to behave, and the sooner you learn that the better. You must stop this crying at once because there is no need for all this noise.”
His voice was firm, but calm. He did not shout at John. However, speaking to John as if he were a grown man did not work either. Victor stared, looking lost, and that was exactly how Lydia felt as well.
It occurred to her that if he was more pleasant, then they might have used this as an opportunity to bond. They could have found some respite with each other, but instead, it felt as though she had to deal with this all by herself. There had to be something she could do, perhaps a combination of words or a particular song or a certain way to hold him.
Then again, it might just be that he knew she wasn’t his mother, and in that case, nothing could help soothe him.
But then John twisted in her arms as if he were going to leap out. With both of his tiny hands, he reached away from her.
To Victor.
“I think he wants you,” Lydia said in a strained tone as she was trying to keep hold of John.
“Me? Why does he want me?”
“I don’t know. He’s a baby. He hasn’t developed discerning taste yet,” she said. She closed the distance between her and Victor while the Duke put his hands up, trying to avoid holding the crying baby.
“Victor, it’s not as though you haven’t held him before,” Lydia scolded.
“It’s different when he’s like this. He’s like a wild animal.”
“He’s just upset, and he wants you. Perhaps he’ll settle down when he gets what he wants.”
“I’m not sure we should give into him like that. He needs to learn that he cannot throw a tantrum to get his own way.”
“Victor, he’s a baby. He is not going to understand that. Please, just take him,” she said. John had ideas of his own as well. Thebaby practically leaped into Victor’s arms. Lydia went with him, and Victor had no choice but to take John.
As this happened, Lydia became aware of the close proximity between them. It was only the briefest of touches, but it was enough to send a wave of arousal flashing through Lydia’s body. She staggered back, so intense was the touch, so desperate was she to bring relief to her arms. A dizzying feeling passed through her mind, for the sensation was startling and disturbing.
Victor held John tightly, his hands clasped around the baby’s body. John’s legs dangled down, and he was still crying.
“He’s still crying,” Victor said in a deadpan tone.
“Come, sit down. He’s not comfortable,” Lydia said, gesturing to the seat.
“That makes two of us,” the Duke replied, but he did as Lydia suggested. She showed him how to cradle John and how to rock him back and forth. John looked so small in Victor’s hands, as though he might disappear.
“Make sure you support the head,” she said.
“It’s hardly as though it’s going to fall off,” he replied, although again he followed her guidance. John started to settle. The crying slowed, like a torrent of water that became a trickle, and then stopped completely. John nestled into the Duke’s arms and breathed happily. Lydia did the same. The tension that wrappedaround her chest loosened, and she was able to breathe more easily. She put a hand to her forehead and smiled.
“Are all babies so demanding?” he asked, arching his eyebrows as he stared at John.
“Only the clever ones,” she replied.
