ThankGodforLuca.And Deb, really. Though I guess I shouldn’t be surprised that she shut down the diner to help us look for Salem.
Luca has been my saving grace. He’s kept me calm; he’s talked me down. He’s entertained Nora, keeping her relaxed by telling her stories. He even roped her into doing a creative writing exercise. Forfun. She loved it, and now I have three paragraphs about a dog who saved a cat from a well stuck to the fridge.
I wouldn’t be functioning without him. As it stands, I’ve had to rush off to the bedroom multiple times to freak out in private so Nora wouldn’t worry or freak out too. Of course she knows that Salem is gone, but she doesn’t understand the gravity.
It’s been just over fifteen minutes since Jasper told me they were leaving Hunter’s and heading back home.
Fifteen minutes that have dragged by. Fifteen minutes that have tested the bounds of my patience. Fifteen minutes of wondering what version of Salem I’m going to get when he comes through the door. Fifteen minutes that have felt like a fucking lifetime.
“They’re almost here.”
Luca’s voice snaps me out of my frantic pacing. “How do you know?”
He turns his phone around, showing me Austin’s location.
“Can you—?” I can’t even get all the words out, but it doesn’t matter. Luca nods, his eyes knowing, and I tear out of the house like my ass is on fire.
The second I step onto the porch, the sound of Austin’s truck coming down the road reaches my ears.
It feels like it takes forever, but finally, Austin’s truck comes into view. The second I see it, my eyes fill with tears, and it turns into a blurry blob of black.
They pull into the driveway, tires crunching on the gravel. I’m moving before they come to a stop, and the truck is still rolling when I pull open the back door.
“Arlo,” Salem chokes out, his voice raw.
He’s okay. He’s here. He’s safe. His hair is a wreck, and there are pieces of hay stuck in it. His eyes are red-rimmed, his face flushed and blotchy. But he’shere.
“You worried the fuck out of me,” I say, my throat tightening and tears spilling over.
His face contorts, and then he’s unbuckling his seatbelt and throwing himself into my arms.
He’s almost as big as I am, and when his solid weight slams into my chest, the force of it makes me stumble backward. I manage to stay upright, wrapping my arms tightly around him and squeezing the absolute fucking life out of him.
“You’re okay,” I say, trying to keep myself from breaking down. “I’m so sorry, Salem. So fucking sorry. I didn’t mean what I said. I’d do anything for you.Anything.I’d suffer anything for you. I’d fight the entire world for you. I’m so fucking sorry.”
He sobs openly in my arms, his body shaking and his chest heaving. “No,I’msorry. I shouldn’t have been so mean. I’m going to do better. Iwantto do better. Please don’t be mad at me.”
I shake my head, burying my face in his hair. “I’m not mad at all. I love you. Fuck, I love you so much. You scared the shit out of me, kid. Don’t ever do that to me again.”
A broken laugh bursts from his chest. “Never. I promise.”
I close my eyes, hugging him tighter, and when I open them and look around, I realize Salem and I are standing outside alone. There aren’t words to describe how thankful I am that Jasper and Austin gave us this small moment in private.
“Is Nora okay?” Salem asks quietly. “Did I scare her?”
“She’s okay.” There’s no point in making him feel bad for freaking her out. Besides, Luca had it under control. Thank God for that, because if it was up to me, she’d probably be just as big of a wreck as I was.
Salem starts to pull away, so I release him, then make eye contact. “I’m so sorry,” I repeat, my throat raw.
He shakes his head. “You didn’t do anything wrong. I didn’t mean what I said. I was… I was afraid that Jasper was going to make us leave.”
My heart clenches. “What do you mean?”
Sniffling, he breaks eye contact. “Everything is so nice here, Arlo. I know it’s been a while since you’ve lived in Tennessee, but I know you have to know what I mean. Look at what we came from, and look at all this.” His eyes dart around as he waves his hand toward the house.
His words stop me dead. I’ve spent a lot of time fighting with myself, trying to convince myself that Jasper isn’t too good for me. Jasper has worked his ass off trying to convince me too.
And now, staring at my sweet baby brother? I’m finding I believe it in ways I never have before. How can I believe with my whole heart that Salem is worthy of Jasper’s love and attention and care, but not myself? How can I believe that I’m somehow too damaged, too broken, but Salem isn’t? I’d never tell him the things I tell myself.
