When I look back down, her whole demeanor has changed. She’s looking down at the water with a blank stare.
I squeeze her foot to get her attention. “Hey. You okay?”
“Yeah.” She nods her head and wipes her wet hand down her face.
When she looks up again, her face is wet, and her eyes are a little red. Is she trying to hide the fact that she was crying?
“What’s up, Blake? Talk to me.”
“Nothing. I’m totally fine. Just sad for you and Clover. And I’m exhausted.”
I eye her skeptically. “I don’t buy it.”
“Well, there's nothing for sale.” She looks at the wall beside her, avoiding my gaze.
I squeeze her foot again, this time harder. It gets her attention. “Hey. I was vulnerable with you. It’s your turn now.”
“What? You think I’m avoiding telling you something?”
“That’s exactly what I think.”
“We played that question card game for several hours last night and today. I was a completely open book. Why would I hide something from you now?”
“Because you’d be letting your guard down if you told me something vulnerable.”
“You don’t call me spilling all my dirty secrets letting my guard down?”
"No.”
She glares at me like I just insulted her.
“There's a difference between being open and honest versus letting your guard down. You can share all your secrets that get a laugh out of others, but until you let someone in here.” I lean forward and tap her chest.
She pushes my hand away. "Don't be cheesy."
"I'm not. If you aren't able to let people see the vulnerable parts of you, the parts that youdon'tshare with everyone so freely, then you're not letting your guard down. Was there a single story that you told during those games that you haven't told ten other people?"
“I don’t know.” She's being dismissive, really trying to change the subject.
I’m not letting her off that easily, but I know I have to be gentle with her. Blake pretends to be all tough, and maybe she is, but when it comes to this kind of stuff, she’s scared.
I put her foot to the side again and grab her thighs. I pull her toward me until she’s straddling my lap. I hear water splash over the edge of the tub with the motion, but I don't care.
“Please tell me. Something. Anything.”
For the first time in the last few minutes, she looks into my eyes. I can see her fear. Fear of being vulnerable. I wrap my arms around her to make her feel safe. I feel this desperate need to have her trust me. The rope scene was the first step, but I need something from her that’s not physical.
I’d kill to be one of the few people that Blake trusts with the secrets she keeps locked deep inside. Secrets that maybe her friends don’t even know about. We all have them.
She takes a deep breath and swallows hard. “One thing.”
“That’s all I’m asking.”
“Someone I loved died in a car accident, too.”
My chest tightens at the thought of Blake feeling even a fraction of the pain I felt when I lost Daisy.
“Who?”
