Elizabeth caressed his arm and nestled a little closer to his side. “You did not know his true nature, and she is no longer a little girl. It is not as though you were actually arranging their union. It was just a possibility you recognised. I shall change the topic in an effort to improve your mood. You can expect me to always do this. I consider part of my duty as your wife to ensure you are cheerful and not weighed down by unpleasant thoughts. So, my darling Mr Darcy, tell me, when did you begin to seriously consider me as the companion of your future life? I often told myself that it could never be, as much as a dozen times a day. I am a gentleman’s daughter, but few men would overlook my lack of fortune or my mother’s connexions to trade. To add to it, your behaviour confounded me. You were friendly and attentive one day, then you appeared almost angry with me the next time we met.”
“That was becauseIwas confused about you and Mr Collins. Those moments when I believed your heart was free, I was overjoyed and took delight in being near you. When I saw you together, so easy and friendly, and knowing how your sisters and mother would benefit by your marriage, I was miserable. I am not good at disguising my feelings.”
He shook his head, dispelling the remembrances. “To answer your question, I hardly know. As much as I just spoke of Georgiana benefiting from my marriage, I would never select a wife simply for her sake. In wanting you as my wife, I am being entirely selfish. From the day we met, I was drawn to you. I hated having to attend an assembly, but then”—he let out a happy sigh—“then there wasyou. It was not just that you are beautiful—”
She gave a surprised bark of laughter, and he took a moment to assure her she was the loveliest lady of his acquaintance, which she dismissed as nonsense until his kiss stopped her retorts.
“More important than your looks, there was something in your air that took hold of me. There is a certain lightness and liveliness that encompasses you, and when I discovered you are interested in the world about you and the welfare of people beyond just your family, what choice did I have? How could I not fall in love with you?”
She pulled him behind a massive elm which provided shelter from anyone in the house observing them. There, she wrapped her arms about his neck and kissed him soundly. Her boldness did not surprise him; if anything, he savoured it. Although she did not say it, he sensed their separation had weighed on her as it had him. His darling Elizabeth had thought he did not care for her—or that he did, but would not marry her because of her situation in life—and he had believed she had given herself to another man. It was in the past, but it would take more than one day for him to believe he was not dreaming.
They resumed walking, which helped to keep the day’s coldness from affecting them over much.
“I very much enjoyed meeting Mr Gardiner, and I anticipate knowing your aunt. From how you have spoken of her, I am convinced I shall like her very much. I do not know whether I should admit this, but as much as I was attracted to you from the beginning, and as much as I began to see that there could be no one better suited to me than you, I was cautious. As you said, you are a gentleman’s daughter, but I was raised with the expectation that I would marry a lady like my mother—one of high birth and large fortune. That mattered less to me the more I knew you, and when I met Mr Gardiner and saw that he is truly a gentleman, regardless of his profession, I knew there was no further impediment. I shall warn you that some of my relations may be a little aloof at first, but I am confident once they know you, they will embrace you. Georgiana will adore you.”
“I am glad, especially about your sister. I own, I was a little worried they would not be pleased with your choice. When you left, I was as wretched as Jane. She had cause, given the way Mr Bingley first devoted himself to her and then abandoned her. For my part, I knew I had only myself to blame. I had allowed myself to feel more than friendship for you, even though I told myself there was no reason for me to expect it would lead to something more than amusing conversations while you remained at Netherfield Park.”
“That you thought so only shows that you, my darling Elizabeth, underestimated me. However, I know my behaviour warranted your suspicions. All three of us were miserable, and only two of us have the good fortune of finding happiness in all of this. I must tell your sister about Bingley. I spoke to your father about it, and he agrees.” He sobered, knowing he would cause Miss Bennet more pain.
“I do as well. If you would like, I shall talk to her.”
Darcy shook his head. “I am the one who spoke to him and his sister. If Miss Bennet has questions, I can answer them, and I would like her to know I am willing to tell her anything she wants to know, if she feels it will alleviate her injury. Even if there is no immediate effect, I pray she will be able to use what I say to forget about this dreadful period more expeditiously than would otherwise happen.”
She nodded and gave him a sombre smile. “Thank you for caring so much for Jane’s well-being.”
He waved the sentiment away. Miss Bennet would soon be his sister, for one, and for another, a small part of him believed her sorrow was a result of his failure. If he had recognised the Bingleys for what they were, they might never have come to Hertfordshire, and Miss Bennet would not be suffering. Thinking he had any role in what had transpired was ridiculous, but he could not help it.
Of course, if he had not come to Meryton, he would not have met Elizabeth. It was a horrible thought, and Darcy dismissed it at once.
“If your parents agree, would you accompany me to town before the wedding? Some of my family will be there, and it would be an opportunity for you to meet them. After we are wed, my preference would be to go to Derbyshire for two or three months. It is better for me to be at Pemberley while we are preparing for the spring planting and the other work that is best attended to in the warmer seasons. Though we can make other arrangements, if you prefer,” Darcy said. With everything settled between them, he was impatient to show her off to his relations and especially for her and Georgiana to know each other.
“Both sound like excellent suggestions. I expect my father and mother will give their permission, and the Gardiners will be glad to have me.”
“I wondered whether you would like to ask Miss Bennet to join us, both in town and after we are married. Your father has already given his approval. I told him I thought a change might do her good, and he felt likewise.”
The smile she gave him was full of appreciation and affection. She expressed her thanks in a delightful manner. Soon after, they returned to the warmth of the house.
CHAPTERFORTY-NINE
At breakfast, Lydia asked Mr Darcy dozens of questions, and Elizabeth worried she was bordering on pestering him. But he, her wonderful, warm-hearted, generous soon-to-be-husband, did not seem to mind. He answered each one with patience, telling her youngest sister about his house in town, describing Lambton in relation to Meryton and assuring her that, ‘when she visited’, she would like it, and far more. When he mentioned the music room at Pemberley, Mary entered the conversation, but soon Mr Bennet quieted them all and demanded further information on the library.
In short, it was a lively meal, and she was elated with how Mr Darcy was welcomed by her family. Even Jane smiled and gave every evidence of pleasure. Nevertheless, Elizabeth noticed signs of her ongoing sadness. There was something more, too, most likely an awareness that Mr Darcy could explain Mr Bingley’s abhorrent behaviour. Even a slight reminder of him or his sister made Elizabeth’s blood heat. She prayed she never saw either of them again. Her good manners might not withstand such a test. How could she not berate them for injuring a man whom they claimed was a dear friend? What excuse could Mr Bingley offer for the cruelty he had shown Jane? Mr Darcy could defend himself. He had told her about threatening to tell everyone in society the truth, should the Bingleys or their associates attempt to spread false rumours about him, his family, or the Bennets. What recourse did Jane have, as a gently-born lady? None, as far as Elizabeth could discern. It was exceedingly vexing, and she loved Mr Darcy all the more for being worried about Jane and his desire to see her return to her usual self. Elizabeth would not be surprised if he undertook a little matchmaking on Jane’s behalf, and would perhaps attend to her younger sisters in the years to come, ensuring they met good, eligible gentlemen who would make them fine husbands. Although there was a great deal she still had to learn about him, he struck her as the sort of person who would quickly view her sisters and her parents as his own. Likely, he was already beginning to.
After the meal, Mrs Bennet insisted they talk about the wedding. She, Mr Darcy, and Elizabeth went into the smaller parlour where they would be undisturbed. The fire had been built up, making the sitting room cosy.
“I have been thinking about nothing else since yesterday. I know young people are always anxious to be married as soon as possible. As soon as Mr Bennet offered for me, every hour until I was Mrs Bennet seemed like a year.”
Her eyes took on a faraway quality for a moment, and Elizabeth smiled to think about her parents once being young and deeply in love. Both claimed it was so, and she had some vague memories from her distant childhood of them preferring to be together as much as possible, laughing and chatting easily. Currently, although they usually managed quite well, that sort of affection was plainly a thing of the past, and it made Elizabeth a little sad. If she could do anything about it, she and Mr Darcy would not face the same future. They were beginning from a stronger position, being far more compatible than her mother and father had ever been.
“What do you propose, Mrs Bennet?” Mr Darcy’s deep voice pulled Elizabeth out of her reverie.
Mrs Bennet furrowed her brow and worried a lace handkerchief. “I do not see how we can have everything arranged in less than two months. It was different with dear William and Kitty. I knew they would become engaged as soon as William secured a living, even though Mr Bennet told them they should wait until Kitty was older. Why should they? I asked. They love each other so much, and as long as he has enough of an income to support a wife, they should be allowed to get on with their lives.”
“Papa gave his permission when he saw they were not inclined to wait,” Elizabeth interjected, hoping to avoid a long discussion of the rights and wrongs of Kitty marrying at seventeen.
“Very true, very true, and now she is Mrs Collins. I am glad you saw them, Mr Darcy, and brought such cheering news about their situation with you. It is such a comfort to know your own dear aunt is William’s patroness. It is very hard for a mother to send her daughter so far away, you see, to know you cannot talk to her and ensure she is doing well in her new role as a wife and, perhaps in just a few months, mother. Not that I worry William will be a bad husband—or you, of course! I am sure you will do everything within your power to ensure my Lizzy is happy and remains well.”
“I most certainly shall, madam. If you would like, I shall write to you personally to assure you of her well-being.”
