Even though they’re right, Iwant to scream at them, especially Jude and Lola, tell him he’s an asshole and tell her she’s a bitch, that it’s not like she hasn’t changed her mind on a dime before. So, Ido.
Then Iscream at my parents like a bratty pre-teen that was just told she can’t attend the popular girls’ sleepover or something. “I can’t believe you would shut me down like this!”
Dad rises from his chair and grips the top of the leather lounger like it owes him money. “I can’t believe you would risk tearing down what we’ve built as a family, Baby!”
“Maybe Iwas building something with Jett, too!”
“Then why would it take you eight bloody years to notice that? Ithink you’re depressed and lonely and confused! You’re an adult, and you have needs, and Iget that, but hell, why couldn’t you have them met by someone we’re not so interconnected with? Someday we plan to make an entire album together, Baby. Itwould be awkward as fuck to spend eight hours a day in the studio with the fucker that broke my Baby’s heart! You don’t get that?”
“Break my heart? God fucking damn it, Dad! Can’t a girl date? I’m not asking for a ring, okay, Ijust wanna spend some time with him. Is that a bloody crime?”
“Oh, it’s gonna be bloody all right! Ugly, too! Our boy is no saint, and despite your efforts to be on your best behaviour all these years neither are you, dear!”
I scream and storm off, my specialty. My feet thud hard on each step as Istomp up the staircase, slamming the door to my suite behind me. Full. Baby Morningstar. Tantrum mode. Ilock the door and whack my right fist against it, then my left, right, left, right, left … once again, like a toddler. Being locked up in my princess room makes me even angrier despite doing this to myself. My blush pink walls that match my flowing pink silk canopy above my bed feel like they’re closing in on me. Iremove each and every blush colored throw pillow from my bed one at a time by picking it up, screaming into it, and chucking it against the wall. The only thing left on my bed now is the little black rectangle that fills me with dread just looking at it.
I hear the subtle knock of my mum at the door. “Baby?”
“NO!” Ithrow myself down on the bed in a huff.
“Honey, we’re just trying to protect you!”
“Maybe you should go check my God damn driver’s license, mum, because I’m not sixteen anymore!” Ihave literally never regretted staying here with them until this very moment. She has me sounding like I’m too young to even drive. Absolutely infuriating.
“You’ll always be that age to us, Baby! That’s just how parents are! We’re sorry we couldn’t protect you from Ace, and Ithink protecting you from Jett is the correct move right now. He’s a great friend, sweetie, just a terrible boyfriend. We love him, Baby, just… not for you. Not right now.”
I shove my AirPods in my ears, like a teenager, and blast angry metal so Ipretend she’s not there, saying the stupidest shit only an actual teen should have to listen to. Iglare at my phone for several minutes before my brain says Imight as well rip the fucking Band-Aid off, and Ipick it up with a shaky, pathetic exhale.
Jett: ‘Baby plz tell me Iget to hold you against me again?’
Jett: ‘I’m harder than steel just thinking about how you’ll taste’
Jett: ‘Pretty girl! What did they say?’
Jett: ‘Baby? I’m gettin’ … concerned’
Tears prick the corner of my eyes, and my throat aches with a caught sob. Earlier, alone with him by the pool, Icouldn’t think, and all Icould do was feel. All Icould feel was lust. But if Ijust wanted Jett’s dick, why would Ibe crying like this? I’m so confused, more angry, salty tears flow down my cheeks, dragging my eye makeup along with them.
Fuck it, Jett’s not a person Ihide things from, so Isend a few bawling emojis along with…
Me: ‘They’re a hard no, currently’
Jett: ‘Oh fuck, serious?’
And then right as Igo to press a different key, Jett starts face-timing, and Iaccidentally press accept. Iimmediately tilt the screen away from my face.
“Jett! I—” Isay, followed by a sad little hiccup, “didn’t want you to actually see me looking like that emoji!”
“Don’t hide from me, Baby, please? Let me see you.”
“Like this?” Iturn the camera back on myself begrudgingly. Why has Jett always had the power to make me agree to anything he asks? Does that meanif he had asked me out at any point, Iwould have said yes? My brain won’t even let me go there.
“You’re beautiful,” he drawls. Iswear, just hearing that come out of his mouth, with his letter T allergy, is enough to melt my brain completely. “Hot goth girl in a pink princess palace with your mascara runnin’ all sexy like that, Mads. It’s a bloody contrast, but it’s hot as hell, yeah? I’d tell you just how hot, but … you’re breaking my heart with those tears! What happened?”
“Jett.” Iwipe a tear with my knuckle. “What the fuck doeswe love him but just not for youeven mean?”
“They said that?” Jett shakes his head and his jaw tightens. “Ah, Isee, I’m good enough to get a spot on the fucking Christmas card photo! But heaven forbid Iput a hand on their daughter, now suddenly I’m a piece of shit. Real great, thanks Jewels! Thanks a fucking ton, Max!” he practically growls, loudly, and lets out a ragged exhale.
His fingers curl into his glossy dark hair, raking the stray strands back and tugging, hard. The camera shakes as he gets up and starts pacing around what appears to be an enormous bedroom painted, no shit,jetfucking black, with lyrics scrawled across the walls in dripping silver paint. Isee a black leather headboard and red satin sheets. Jesus, this is where he’s fucked everyone. Everyone but me! My family is acting like they’re refusing to approve of a marriage proposal when I’ve never even been in this boy’s fuckinghouse!Annoyance and rage practically ooze from my pores.
