‘So, what’s been going on?’ Robert asks. ‘Why is Eva home early?’
I put the key issue to one side for the moment and start at the beginning of my day, when Katie went missing, and finish up with Eva’s disastrous morning at school. I haven’t yet mentioned the car graffiti, as it’s too much all in one go. I want to concentrate on Eva’s issue first.
‘Bloody hell,’ Robert says, taking my hands in his. ‘What a crazy morning! I’m so sorry I wasn’t here to help you sort it out. What can I do? Want me to speak to Miss Charming?’
I give a small smile at his nickname for Miss Chalmers. Charming she is not. ‘No, it’s okay. I’m pretty sure she didn’t have a choice. I think we’ve just got to suck up Eva’s punishment. But it does mean she’s going to be at home for the next two days. Will you be okay to keep an eye on her? I’ve got to work.’
‘I’ve got clients. Why don’t I get Mum to look after her?’ Robert suggests. ‘She won’t mind if it’s just for a couple of days.’
I feel my shoulders getting heavier. Diane was a stay-at-home mum when Robert and James were young – as she’s very fond of telling me – so every time we ask for her help with childcare I feel like I’m failing.
‘Don’t look like that,’ Robert says with a smile. ‘You know Mum loves having the girls over.’
I sigh. Diane doesn’t approve of working mothers. The woman is like something out of the 1950s. I definitely am not what Diane imagined as a mother to her grandchildren. I’m an only child from a working-class background, brought up by my mum. I never knew my dad. Compared to me, Robert comes from serious money, so I’m sure Diane thought I was a gold digger. She was a little put out when my business started taking off, just after Eva was born, and my income soared. It didn’t fit with her image of me.
When Diane’s husband Terence was alive, he wouldn’t let his sons have any handouts, which is why Robert started his personal-training business. But after his dad died a couple of years ago, Diane wanted to start paying him a monthly allowance to help with bringing up the children, even though my earnings mean we don’t really need it. Robert said no to the allowance, much to Diane’s disappointment. I’m sure she would have tried to use it as a way to exert more control over my family.
‘So I’ll give Mum a call about tomorrow and Friday?’ Robert asks.
I don’t really have any choice in the matter. ‘Okay. But don’t let her spoil Eva. She’s off school because she walloped her friend, so she needs to do schoolwork, or at least read, not go online or watch TV.’
‘Should we get her down and have a talk to her?’ Robert asks, heading towards the door.
‘Hang on, there’s something else I need to tell you.’ I explain about finding my car sprayed with the words ‘bad mother’, and his mouth drops open.
He pulls me to my feet and gives me a hug. ‘What a crappy day you’ve had.’
‘The thing is,’ I say, trying to keep my voice from breaking, ‘the thing is, maybe I am. Maybe I really am a terrible mother.’
‘Don’t be ridiculous. You’re the best mother in the world.’ His eyes soften and he puts a hand to my cheek.
‘That’s lovely of you to say, but we both know it’s not true…’ I sniff. ‘I love the kids to death, but I spend most of my time working.’ I pull away from my husband’s arms and begin pacing the kitchen.
‘Yes. You do. You work bloody hard. You’re an amazing role model. A strong, working mum. There are all kinds of mothers – whether you stay at home or go out to work, as long as you love your kids, then no one has a right to judge or spray-paint horrible stuff on your car.’
‘Thank you.’ I stop pacing for a moment and lean back against the kitchen counter. ‘You know, my mum worked hard all her life. She didn’t have a choice. But I do. Maybe I’m making the wrong one?’
‘Are you really going to let some cowardly vandal make you feel insecure about yourself?’ Rob says, his head tilted to the side.
‘I suppose not.’
‘Good. Well then, we should report it to the police. Maybe they can find out who did it.’
I cringe at the thought of explaining it to them. ‘Do we have to?’
‘No, but—’
‘It’s humiliating.’
‘Don’t let some jerk make you feel bad. It’s not humiliating.’
‘Having to tell the police that someone thinks I’m a crap mum is definitely humiliating. I had a thought earlier… you don’t think it could have been Rebecca, do you?’
Rob stares at me as though I’m crazy. ‘Rebecca? You mean Lauren’s mum?’
‘She could have done it in retaliation for Eva hitting her daughter.’
‘That’s a bit extreme. You don’t really believe that, do you?’
