“Aye. Kelly does a bit as well. My grandmother had an old piano that she taught me on. I’ve just always loved music.”
“Hence the pipe band.”
He nodded. “Aye, the band is fun. We start gigging again soon.”
“You know, if you need to book those when Kelly is here, I’ll be here now to look after her.”
“I appreciate that, but I make sure we don’t have gigs when Kelly’s here. I don’t get to see her as it is, so when she visits, I clear my schedule for her.”
My heart ballooned at his words, and I quickly turned to the guitars on the wall. “You might get full custody of her by then.”
“Let’s hope so.”
“You play guitar too?”
“I do. You?”
“No, I’m strictly piano.”
“Will you … will you play for me?
My head whipped to him in surprise.
Murray rubbed at his bearded cheek, the bristles sounding in the quiet of the room. “Unless you get stage fright no matter how small the audience?”
I didn’t. I’d always been fine playing for friends and family. Put me on stage in front of a bunch of strangers, however, and I practically hyperventilated. Now, my fingers itched to touch the keys. They had ever since I’d spied the baby grand. “I haven’t played in about three years. Nick—my ex—the first time I went to his penthouse he had a baby grand in the center of his living room.” I curled my lip in memory. “It was there for show. A beautiful instrument, sitting there like an unused accessory. So I sat down and I started to play Debussy’s ‘Clair de Lune.’ Nick acted like he thought it was great, but the next time I went to his apartment, the piano was gone. He said it was taking up too much room.” I blanched at the memory, wondering how I hadn’t known right in that moment Nick was an asshole. “I should have known then.”
“Like I should have known about Jill?” Murray’s voice was soft. “Why do we always blame ourselves for other people’s bad actions?”
As our eyes held, an understanding threaded between us.
Just as quickly, it turned to tension. The kind of tension that made me want to kiss him. Unfortunately, I was pretty sure that tension was all one-sided. Flustered and trying to hide it, I strode over to the piano stool and lowered myself onto it.
“You don’t have to if?—”
“I’m fine playing for friends and family. And Nick doesn’t get to take it from me like my parents tried to … right?”
Murray studied me intensely. “Right.”
Breaking our gaze, I lifted my hands over the keys. I closed my eyes, visualizing the notes that immediately came to mind. It was a popular piece, but it was popular for a reason. As my fingers danced over the keys, Chopin’sNocturne in E Flat Majorsang from the piano. To my delight, muscle memory kicked in and I played it like I played it almost fifteen years ago. Well, not quite. I didn’t play it with the same ease. But I felt a rush of longing to practice it, to get better, to play it perfectly, and I hadn’t felt that in such a long time.
As the last note rang out, I lowered my hands to my thighs and stared at the keys in wonder.
I hadn’t realized just how much I’d missed playing.
“My parents don’t know I’m married,” I blurted suddenly.
“Do you want to tell them?”
I looked up at Murray, who leaned against the back of the sofa now. “No. Every time I tell them something about my life, they find a way to make me feel shitty about it.”
“I’m sorry.”
“This”—I gestured to the piano—“is the only good thing they ever gave me. I mean, that matters. I know I grew up privileged and I’m grateful that I never had to worry about money or being safe. But that’s about all I can say they ever gave me. A nice home, a nice education, and piano. They cut me off as soon as I made choices they didn’t agree with. And we’re not talking about me doing drugs or breaking the law … I chose to go to culinary school.” I huffed bitterly. “I guess they gave me more than some kids get, though, right?”
Murray frowned. “Do your parents know why you came to Scotland?”
“Yes. They didn’t believe me about Nick. Not until he was arrested for insider trading.”
