And now I’d have to spend an hour tonight brushing out all the knots before bed. Great.
“Where’s my toothbrush?” Junie demanded, opening up the medicine cabinet and inspecting. She whirled toward Ivy. “What did you do with it?”
Ivy walked away from the bathroom, tucking her hands behind her back, looking nothing short of suspicious. “Nothing.”
“Daisy!” Junie yelled at me, far louder than she needed to since I stood a foot away.
A headache flared behind my eye. My best friend, Nellie, had this thing of spelling words in her head when she was overwhelmed. I’d tried that once, but my house was so loud that I could barely hear myself think. I wasn’t really good at spelling, either.
One word I did have down, though, wasU-G-H.
I grabbed Ivy’s small arm as she tried to walk by me. “What did you do with Junie’s toothbrush?”
Ivy blinked her doe eyes at me, instantly exposing her guilt. “Nothing! I didn’t touch it!”
We didn’t have time for this. Their bus would be here any minute. Junie still didn’t have her teeth brushed, Ivydidn’t have her backpack, Penn wasn’t out of bed, and I hadn’t even checked on Theo again.Please, God, let him still be dressed. Please.
“Ivy,” I began slowly, fighting for patience I was running out of. “I need you to tell me what you did with?—”
“It’s in the garbage!” Junie’s shriek reached eardrum-piercing levels. “Ew, Ivy, why is itwet?”
Ivy smiled, exposing her missing front teeth. “I accidentally dropped it in the toilet.”
Yeah, and I’d bet money there’d been nothingaccidentalabout it.
Letting out a rageful sound, Junie grabbed the plastic cup that we kept on the counter and launched it. Instead of hitting Ivy, though, who I was sure was her target, the cup flipped up and caught me square in the eye. My head cracked back as half of the world exploded into white, painful stars, and suddenly, the hallway plunged into silence. The only sound in the house was the plastic cup clattering to the ground.
My skin flared hot and cold at the same time, body vibrating as fury whipped through me. I had to clamp my jaw shut to keep from screaming.
Whenever I’d reached my boiling point in the past, I’d always use the same self-soothing technique.It’s okay, I’d tell myself.It’s not forever.You’ll be off to NYU in the fall, and this won’t be your problem anymore.
Now, though, the words were empty. A lie.Foreverloomed like a dark shadow, swirling around me in silence.
Swallowing hard, I bent down and picked the cup up,ignoring the pulsing ache and the little girl beside me with her hands over her mouth. I walked toward the bathroom, not meeting Junie’s wide eyes. “I-I’m sorry,” she whispered as I came closer. Her red cheeks were now pale. “I—I didn’t mean?—”
“Use your finger to brush your teeth,” I told her in a forcefully calm voice, flipping on the faucet and filling the plastic cup with water. “I’ll get you a new one today.”
Junie nodded silently.
“And if you throw anything at your sister again, Junie, I’ll tell Mom.”
If possible, Junie paled further.
I walked down the hall with the cup full of water, barely pausing at my littlest sister, who still hadn’t moved from the middle of the walkway. “Ivy, if you touch her toothbrush again, I’ll putyoursin the toilet and make you brush your teeth with it. Got it?” Those doe eyes filled with tears, but she still nodded. “Get your bag and get downstairs for the bus.”
She skittered into the bedroom she shared with Junie, and for a moment, I just stood in the hall, feeling sick. Threats. It was bad parenting, but Iwasn’ttheir parent. I wasn’t supposed to be. I hated that it took me getting angry for them to listen, but there wasn’t time to have a productive chat about it.
I ducked back into Penn’s room, finding her still sprawled out on her bed. This time, I gave no warning.
I threw the water straight into her face.
Penn screamed as she shot out of bed, face dripping. “Daisy!”
“Good. You’re up.” I tossed the now-empty cup onto her covers. “Bus gets here in five. Take this back to the bathroom when you brush your teeth, would you?”
I took her yelled response as a yes.
With everyone else moving, I poked my head back into the last bedroom, finding my six-year-old little brother sitting on his bed with my phone in his chubby little hands. He liked to play a tile-matching game on my phone, but I only let him if he got around early in the morning.
