“Bummer that they’re closed for maintenance tonight.” I thought of the art store.Story of my life.
Nellie gave a theatrical sigh. “A travesty, is what it is.T-R-A-V-E-S-T-Y.” She smiled, her squished cheek giving her grin an almost demented look. “But I’m not alone tonight. Tonight, I’ve got my bestie.”
Right. I usually never joined the twins on book club night. Mom usually got home around five-thirty, which meant Icould’vetagged along to hang with Nellie while Jamie was chatting it up with the elderly, but after school and watching the kids, I hadn’t usually felt like tagging along. But tonight, Mom had surprised us by coming home early with McDonald’s, and the guilt over how I’d left things with Jamie on Monday had been crushing me. I’d reached out to Nellie first this time, asking if I could tag along.
I still couldn’t believe the way I’d talked to Jamie the other day.You’re a good liar. I’d only said it to hurt him, which, in and of itself, was blasphemy. But he’d toed tooclose to thecollegedemarcation line, and I’d fired at him without thinking twice.
I continued sketching in my book, watching as Kit came to life. I sketched him behind the wheel of a car, the perspective peeking through a shattered windshield I planned to draw, with the front grille crushed in. Eventually, I’d get there. Now, I focused on Kit’s eyes. They were normally brown, with a dark ring around the iris.
“How’s everything been with your sister?” I asked Nellie as I sketched. “When are she and her boyfriend going back west?”
“Friday. It’s been nice having her home.” Nellie lifted her head, propping her hand under her chin. “She’s been trying to convince me to go back with them for a week.”
“Are you going to?”
“As if I’d ditch you and Jamierightas you start your fake relationship. I’m thinking after the Fourth of July—things should be quiet by then.”
Right. Because by then, per Jamie’s prediction, Dalton would be over it.
Nellie’s eyes traced me. “How’s everything been with the kids?”
“Fine.” I reached up and discreetly brushed my fingers against my eyebrow. The skin hadn’t bruised too badly from Junie’s elbow to the eye, much to my surprise. It was still tender, but nothing noticeable. “Junie’s had some big feelings lately. We’re working on it.”
I’d tucked her in Monday night and sat on the side of her bed, flicking her hair out of her face. “What’s up withthe aggression lately, Junie? First the cup, now fistfighting Penn in the hallway?”
She’d pulled her blankets up to her chin and had given her shoulders a small shrug.
“It’s not nice to hit people,” Ivy had called lightly from her bed a few feet away.
“Butt out, Ivy.”
But Junie hadn’t given me more than a whispered “sorry, Daisy,” and squished her eyes shut. So, yeah. It was something I should’ve brought up to Mom, but Tuesday she’d come home with makeup smudged around her eyes, but a grin on her face with the kids, and my throat had been too tight to say anything.
“Are they doing any summer camps or anything?” Nellie asked. “They did last year, right?”
“Junie and Ivy did. They’re expensive nowadays.” Before graduation, I’d spent nights scrolling through websites and social media profiles, trying to find camps that’d be a good fit for all the kids except Penn, because I knew she’d refuse to go. There weren’t many options, spots that filled up fast, and even fewer with reasonable rates. Another crappy thing about living in a neighborhood surrounded by rich kids—everything was expensive. “The rates at the camp they went to before doubled from last summer.”
“So you’re just going to keep the kids yourself for the whole summer?”
A wave of unease swept over me at the thought. This last week, between finishing school and thekids finishing school, was my last true break. After Friday, they’d be home all day, every day. There’d be no reprieve.
I drew in a deep breath, forcing my voice to brighten. “It’s not that big of a deal. The summer camp last year was only two days a week—it won’t bethatdifferent. It won’t be that bad.” It felt like wishful thinking.
“I don’t mind babysitting here and there,” Nellie said immediately. “If you ever need a break.”
My pencil skimmed a little across my page, drawing a shadow in an area of Kit’s face I hadn’t wanted. It looked like a scar. Or, weirdly enough, it looked like the dimple on Jamie’s cheek. “It’ll be okay. Penn’s good to watch Ivy and Junie for a few hours, and I can take Theo if I ever need to run errands or anything.”
It hadn’t been the first time Nellie had offered to babysit the kids. I knew she was coming from a good place, but my skin prickled in a way that left me feeling itchy. Antsy. She already watched me too closely because of Dalton; I didn’t need her worrying about anything else.
That was another thing I didn’t really talk about with Nellie or Jamie—home life. I loved my friends, but they lived in a gated community, and their only other sibling was a sister seven years older than them. I wasn’t sure they’d understand if I really got into the details of everything. They didn’t know about the darkness that sometimes reared its head, and they didn’t know about the snaps of resentment. I was too afraid of seeing what their reactions would be, if they’d hate me as much as I hated myself in those moments.
Ultimately, and blessedly, Nellie let it all go. “You and Jamie were kind of gross on Monday.”
My stomach folded over itself, but I looked at her with a large grin. “We were good, huh?”
“Scarily good. I didn’t realize how great of an actor Jamie would be.”
“What about me?”
