“Then why do you want to put the baby up for adoption, honey?”he asks gently.
“Because it will be shunned in my care,” I bark.“I’m not married.It’s a bastard.”
Aaric’s eyes go wide.
I keep shocking him, and I don’t even know why.
He shakes his head.“I need to make a list of banned words you’re never permitted to use again.Harlot and bastard are at the top of the list.Don’t say either of those things again.That’s a precious human being inside you.He or she is not anit.That baby is a sweet new life.No one will judge you or the baby for not being married.People have filled your head with the most cockamamy nonsense I’ve ever heard, Hannah.”
“Iwill judge me.”I’m shaking.He keeps saying things that flip everything I’ve ever known upside down.
“Well, stop judging yourself.You don’t deserve it.I’m going to tell you that you’re kind and good and filled with sunshine until you believe me.You don’t deserve the kind of judgment others have placed on you.Wipe it all from your head.”
I chew on my bottom lip, trying not to cry any more tears.
Aaric closes the short distance between us and pulls me into his embrace.He hugs me close, holding me tight, rubbing my back.
I could stay like this forever.It feels so nice to be in his arms.I don’t deserve the kindness he’s offering.
Except, he keeps telling me I do.Have I been wrong?
Aaric eases back, turns me around so I’m facing the mound of boxes, and holds me close so my back is against his front.“That baby will be here any day.How about you don’t make any rash decisions until then?I bet when you hold the sweet little bundle in your arms, you’ll fall in love with him or her and wonder why you ever thought you could give that sweet baby up for adoption.If you feel nothing, and you don’t think you can raise the baby, we’ll discuss your options.How about that?”
I’m staring at the boxes.Most of them are open.I can see into the tops of a few.Wiggling free of Aaric’s embrace, I step toward something yellow and lift it up.
I gasp.It’s the most adorable tiny onesie.So small it’s hard to imagine it fitting a human being.There’s a sun on the front.A zipper runs from one leg up to the neck.The little booties on the end are precious.“Aaric…”
He hugs me from behind again, his arms firm and supporting.He even leans around and kisses my temple.“Sunshine, like Mommy.”
My lips tremble.I’ve never considered keeping my baby.I’ve forced myself to remain detached.It’s just a life inside me that deserves a chance.I’ve vowed to give it to someone who can love and raise it.
Could that be me?
“We will all help you, Hannah.You’ll live here on Gallant Mountain.There’ll be so many uncles and eventually aunts to help raise this little one.I admit that I feel incredibly protective of you, and I hope you’ll agree to stay in my cabin, but if you don’t want to, you can move into the main house.Everyone will help you.”
Silent tears run down my cheeks as I clutch the yellow onesie.I’ve cried a river today.I don’t remember when I last cried.It’s been a long time.I never let myself get this emotional because it won’t do any good.
Sucking back sobs, I argue, “This baby deserves a better life than I had.It should go to school in town.Have friends.Learn things.”
“If you want the baby to go to school in town, we’ll take the child to school, honey.Done.”
I shake my head.“People will make fun of it for not having a dad.”
Aaric sighs, but his voice is still calm when he speaks.“No one is going to make fun of a kid for not having a dad, sunshine.That’s not a thing.It’s a backward mountain concept meant to keep women submissive and meek.”
I think about his words.
“Men have been telling you what to do and how to think all your life, honey.Most of it was nonsense.They were wrong.They lied to you.That’s over.You’regoing to take control of your own life now.Youmake the decisions for yourself.No one else.You don’t do what anyone orders you to do unless it’s in line with what you want.If you don’t like it, you tell them to bug off.”
I giggle and twist my neck to look at him.“As if I could ever tell a man to bug off.”
“Oh, you certainly can, sunshine.You can start now.Practice on me.What if I told you to unpack all of this and put it away before you can eat?”
I turn all the way around and chuckle.“I’m too tired.Bug off.”
He laughs.“See?Easy.”
“What if I order you to go sit at the table and eat?”
