He stiffened and gently placed his finger under my chin to tilt my head up. “What is wrong, my little human?”
I smiled and tried to hide my churning thoughts. This breath of time with my orc was perfect, a stolen moment in the midst of my inner storm. But…
“My Samantha,” his voice pitched low as he eased from my core and shifted me into a bridal carry, “you may tell me anything. You know this, yes?”
“I’m just,” I snuggled closer to his chest, my arms sliding around his waist, “I’m scared for my friends.”
Guruk didn't move. Didn't change his posture or his expression. He just held me close, one arm under my knees and the other a stable force at my back. He waited for me to take things at my pace.
“It’s my fault,” I bit my lip. “I did this.” The guilt gnawed at me like an ancient beast. It was equally old, stemming from the trauma of foster homes and losing my found family.
“I could tell you otherwise.” He stroked my back, warm and reassuring. “I could give you all the reasons why you should let go of this guilt, but only you can free yourself, my heart.”
“I…,” my body trembled. I knew my orc was right, but shadows were a hard part to let go of. I spoke my biggest fear aloud, hoping to purge myself of it. “I’m scared of what we find at the falls. Because right now, not knowing…well, they could be okay. Any of them could be okay. Mako and Tia, Abby, Robin, and Valeria, and even Raine, even my absolutely maddening frenemy Raine! They're all still possibly fine somewhere in Havenlore, and we just haven't reached them yet.” I exhaled, the knot in my chest a tight ball. “Once we get to the falls and find out what’s there…”
A bird flapped its wings overhead. I looked up for a second, then snapped my gaze to my orc .
“What if they’re not okay? What if we don’t find them?” I sniffed. “Or what if it’s worse?’
Guruk held me impossibly tighter as if he could pour all of his strength into me. “Hope says they are okay. Fear says they might not be.” He kissed my forehead. “You are carrying both. No matter what we face next, you hope and fear because you love them.”
I pressed my lips together hard.
“And for what it is worth,” he continued, his voice dropping to the register he used when he meant something with all his heart, “I believe they are okay. Havenlore is not a cruel world. It may beodd to you, and it has its darknesses, but it does not tend toward cruelty.” His hand found mine under the water. “To whatever end, the falls will give us something to work with. And we will do this together.”
“You don't know what we’ll find,” I said, swiping at stray tears.
“No.” His free hand pushed mine away. He wiped the moisture from my cheek with the unhurried care he brought to everything that mattered to him. “But know I will be beside you regardless of what we find.”
I turned my face into his palm.
The heat of the water and the heat of him were indistinguishable.
“Okay,” I whispered into his hand. That with a touch more strength, “Okay.”
The tug of his fingers beneath my chin was gentle. When I looked up at him his expression undid the last of the remaining tightness in my chest.
“Sammy,” he said, in the voice that made my name into something permanent.
And then he kissed me with infinite care. We made love, slower this time, with the affection that grows between two people over time. The spring held us in its warmth, and everything else could wait.
The light had gonepink at the edges of the sky by the time we climbed out.
Which was significantly less graceful than getting in. The rocks were slick, and I misjudged a step and grabbed Guruk’s arm at the same moment he grabbed my waist. We stood there reorganizing ourselves for longer than strictly necessary because neither of us was in any hurry to be further apart than we had to be.
“My graceful human,” he observed with obvious sarcasm.
I huffed. “Well, I didn't fall.”
“You did not fall,” he agreed, with the gravity of someone awarding a significant honor.
I took my towel, resisting the urge to swat his naked backside, and hid my smile in it instead. He wrapped his around his shoulders and reached to pack the items we’d left ashore. I sat back on the blanket, wringing out my hair and feeling, for the first time since we had left the village, something close to rested.
Not done worrying. Not finished being afraid of what the falls might hold.
But underneath all of that, I was…steady.
Berry stirred on their rock, blinking, and looked between us with the air of someone returning from sleep and rapidly assessing whether anything had changed.
