Kai sighed, shaking his head as he took a sip.“Only time you proposition me, it’s because you want to get out of something.Anybody else would be offended.”
“Anyone else,” I muttered, pointedly, “would’ve said no to the stupid gala dinner.”
A glass of wine later - well, maybe two glasses - I was feeling a little less cynical.Kai did have his unexpected uses, I’d realized: he was enthusiastic and friendly enough that he could single-handedly take care of small talk for the both of us.That meant I could just stand there and smile, nod, and drink, without seeming entirely rude in the process.
“So, is Kai on your team?”one lady asked, as he chatted animatedly with a couple of guys from a company I’d already forgotten the name of.
“Oh, no,” I started.Bit my tongue.“No, he’s not.”
How do you describe a relationship that nobody has ever put actual words to?A relationship that you’re enjoying - absolutely, no doubt about that - but which you couldn’t really begin to define, even if your life depended on it.“He’s my neighbors’ son who came to use my pool, then give me swimming lessons, and now we fuck” might’ve been accurate, but it didn’t seem entirely party-ready.
Instead the silence spooled out awkwardly, our conversation derailed by my unexpected evasiveness.I only felt like I could exhale again when she conveniently saw “an old friend” in a nearby group, and made her excuses.
“People keep asking how we know each other,” I told him, when we next had a moment to ourselves.
Kai raised an eyebrow.“And what have you been telling them?”
I shrugged.“That you’re my personal physician, and that you have to follow me around because of my weak constitution.”
He laughed.“Well, some of that sounds pretty accurate.But my story is probably more believable.”
Frowning, I took a sip from my almost-empty glass.“What’s your story?”
Kai gave me a look that implied I was a little bit crazy.“Um, that we’re seeing each other?”
‘Like a deer in headlights’ always struck me as a ridiculous phrase before - there didn’t seem like there’d be enough time for an expression beyond “oh shit!”when a car’s bumper was headed your way at 60 miles an hour - but I knew, had I a mirror, that was just what the description of my expression would be.
“You told them we’re together?”I asked, eventually.
Kai kept on giving me that bemused look.“I mean, is that not true?”
I opened my mouth.Closed it again.Tried to think of some words before I opened it the next time.
“You’re the one who doesn’t like putting labels on things,” I pointed out.
Kai snorted.“There’s a difference between embracing that things can be fluid, and just plain ignoring the facts, Tate.”
I did my fish impression again, mouth opening and closing and nothing coming out.
Finally, he took pity on me.“Look,” he said, voice mercifully low, “we can tell them we’re friends-with-benefits, or that we fuck, or even that sometimes you destroy my throat with your dick because we both get off on that...but it seems like it would be easier just to ‘fess up to the possibility that we’ve been dating.”
It felt like my contribution to the conversation was predominantly staring, dumbstruck, but I didn’t appear to be able to do much about that.
“Okay,” I said, eventually.
Kai looked at me, skeptically.“That doesn’t sound very ‘okay,’ if we’re being totally honest.”
I shrugged, helplessly.“I hadn’t wanted to assume anything.”
His turn to stare.Finally, he shook his head, slowly, as though coming to some great realization.“You really are ridiculous, and we’re absolutely going to talk about this more sometime, soon, okay?For now if you could just pretend to be comfortable and confident in the fact that we might be here as a couple, at least our stories will match up.”
I nodded, grateful at being rescued, even if it was only a temporary reprieve.Kai reached out and took the glass from my hands.
“Now, I’m getting us another drink, because holy fuck after that little mind-bender I know I certainly need one.I’ll only be a minute.”
I watched his back as he eased his way through the crowd.There was something unmistakably confident in his movements; not pushy, or even particularly forceful.Just a kind of focused intent, that I guess people picked up on even without realizing it.Kai just seemed happy to simply occupy the space, somehow.
“He’s adorable.”
