As if to answer his question, Hannah took the hem of her dress in her hands and pulled it up, over her head.Off. Jude’s eyes widened at the expanse of skin suddenly on show, at the sight of her lilac lace bra. She kissed him again, then yanked at his t-shirt until he shifted his arms to help her remove it.
His palms found her waist, then skimmed up her ribcage to cup her breasts through her underwear. ‘I need the words, Hannah,’ he said, his voice low. Demanding. It sent a fresh wave of need crashing through her.
‘I want you,’ she said urgently, the weight of the words seeming to lift from her body as she spoke them. The truth left her lighter. Freer.Floating. ‘I need you,’ she told him. ‘Stay with me.’
‘All you ever had to do was ask.’
He stood up, taking her with him, and she directed him to her bedroom, thanking the universe that she’d tidied it this morning. In a flurry, they shed almost all that remained of their clothing, only to realise Hannah stillhad her clumpy DM sandals on. They laughed until Jude pushed her back onto the bed, then took her left foot in his hands.
He undid the buckles on each of her shoes with careful precision, dropping them to the floor, then slowly kissed his way from Hannah’s ankles to the apex of her thighs. She gasped and writhed as he teased her, eventually settling exactly where she wanted him. She came with his name on her lips and her hands in his hair.
She pulled him into an embrace, wanting his full weight on her, needing him closer. Jude stared down at her reverently, running his fingers through the mass of strawberry-blonde hair that was splayed beneath her on the pillow. ‘So pretty,’ he whispered. ‘Like all of you, always. You’ve haunted me, Hannah. I haven’t – I couldn’t .?.?. never, with anyone else.’
She didn’t question it. Didn’t need details or receipts. She just kissed him and said, ‘Please.’
He fumbled in the cupboard beside her bed and found what he was looking for. The sound he made as he finally pushed inside her was almost savage; a sharp-edged, shameless groan that spoke of pure pleasure, intense relief. It was so much better than Hannah had remembered; a kaleidoscope of colourful sensation that she’d only been able to imagine in monochrome. It was perfect, searing bliss and she was out of control, beyond all reason. She heard herself beg him for more, urge him not to stop; realised she was careering towards a cliff edge she hadn’t tumbled off in years.
‘With me,’ he said, winding her higher. Tighter.
‘Now,’ he panted into her ear. ‘Let me hear you.’
Hannah was powerless to resist or hold back. She felt tears squeeze from her closed eyes as release broke over her – over both of them – like thunder.
They lay side by side afterwards, turned towards one another. Hannah wasn’t sure whether she should touch him; what it would mean if she did .?.?. how she’d ever let go. Jude made the choice for her after a few seconds, pulling her against him so her face rested on his chest. So she could feel the beat of his heart through his skin.
She wanted to tell him something true: that she loved him, that she’d meant this. That it hadn’t been a mistake, even though she felt sure she’d never get over it.
Instead, with his arms still around her, she fell fast asleep.
24
The next morning, Jude awoke to the realisation that he was warm, wonderfully comfortable and .?.?. completely naked. His heart leapt as he realised that the woman who was still sleeping next to him –Hannah– didn’t have a stitch on, either.
The events of last night came flooding back to him, and he decided that if this was a dream, he didn’t ever want to wake up. He screwed his eyes tight shut, took a deep breath and rolled onto his side, curling into Hannah to become the big spoon.
As his skin made contact with hers, it struck him that there was no way he could be imagining this. His brain was nowhere near creative enough to conjure a mirage this perfect; a body this soft and smooth. He’d always loved her in the mornings – when she was still languid and loose-limbed, not yet awake to the demands of the day. She twisted to face him, eyes still closed, and pressed her lips to his throat.
Jude groaned and pulled her closer, and then they were kissing in a way that was different to last night; less desperate, more deliberate. This was slow and sensual, luxurious and unhurried. God, she was ruining him, second by second, touch by touch – unstitching him at the seams. Still sleepy, acting on pure instinct, she put her hands on him, pushed him onto his back so she could—
And then there was a phone ringing.Hisphone.
He vowed that, when he found it, he was going to throw it out of the window.
Hannah leaned across him to retrieve his jeans from the bedroom floor. She handed them to him and he fished the phone from a pocket, only to curse aloud at the sight of the wordsMum calling.?.?. He showed the screen to Hannah, and she grimaced.
‘Shit,’ he said. ‘She’ll be wondering where I am, and Joe and I have been summoned to lunch today. What time is it?’
‘It’s OK,’ Hannah said. ‘And .?.?.’ She glanced at the clock on her bedside table. ‘Half nine. I’ll put the kettle on.’ She slid out of bed and grabbed a white cotton robe from the back of the bedroom door, wrapping it around herself before leaving the room.
Five minutes later, she reappeared with two cups of tea. Jude felt a wince in his heart at the ordinariness of this; the simple loveliness of it. This time, she hadn’t asked him how he took it.
‘Everything all right?’ she asked.
‘Yeah. Fine. I’m expected at noon. She said she assumed I’d been mugged or murdered when she realised I wasn’t there.’
Hannah sniggered. ‘That was never the first thought whenever Ed didn’t come home.’
‘No, but Jane isn’t .?.?.’ He didn’t saycontrolling, but they both knew that was what he meant.
