My heart tripped at the wayward thought of what else I could do with his face. What the hell is wrong with you? Since when do you get wet at the thought of that delinquent? I ignored the voice in my head that whispered since forever. That is so not true.
I may have had a crush on him when I was young and stupid, but that died when he kept treating me like an annoying kidwho was always underfoot. I’ve moved on from that, thank you very much, and I would thank my subconscious to remember that shit. All the same, it just spurred me on to kick my sparring partner’s ass, but good.
Each kick was a blow to Julius’ solar plexus; each swing was meant to knock his block off. By the time I was done, I was feeling worlds better, and it was only in the shower after that I realized I hadn’t given Dale or his mother a single thought. “That smarmy bastard better stay out of my head.”
JULIUS
What the hell am I playing at anyway? Why did I even get involved? I ignored the little trip in my heart at the reminder of how she looked when I first saw her tonight. There was sadness and a hint of pain in her eyes that I doubt her family had seen; otherwise, that idiot woman might not have made it back to wherever she came from.
As protective as they are of her, I don’t know why I’ve convinced myself that I can see what they can’t, but it is what it is. I’ve always been able to read that one, and the reasons behind that are better left alone. I told myself a long time ago that she’s not for me, not only because I have a good six years on her and a whole lot more in experience, but because deep down, I know that she could burn me worse than anyone else has ever done.
After the catastrophe of my first failed serious relationship, I’ve made it a point to only date women who pose no danger of my genuinely falling in love with them. I’ve had many flings throughout the years, some lasting longer than others, but always with women who were no danger to me.
It's been hard sometimes, especially when I’m around my kid brother and his wife and kids. Seeing the joy in them, that longing is sometimes too much to bear. But then I rememberhow close I came to destroying the people I love because I chose the wrong woman. That’s something I can’t and won’t ever forget.
That one, yeah, I don’t see her being anything like Melanie, but I’m still not willing to risk it. I’ve made up my mind not to put myself through that hell again. The hell of sharing my heart with someone not of my blood. I’m an excellent uncle; that’s going to have to be enough for me in this lifetime.
If I knew she was going to be here tonight, I would’ve found another excuse not to show up, just like I have every other time I knew she would be around. I didn’t expect the feelings to be this sharp still after all these years and all the distance I had put between us to make sure we never interacted, not even in a crowd. Now, I’m going to have to start back at square one. Fucking aye!
I’ve known Jessica since she was a kid; I guess you can say I watched her grow up. Her Dad and mine are doctors who move in the same circles, after all, and have had many consultations together, not to mention the long nights spent at each other’s homes brainstorming some new procedure or another.
Though the men are of differing ages, the camaraderie between them is hard to miss, and the professional respect that the two men bear for each other has long since spilled over into their personal lives. This means that our families have spent lots of time together in social settings, even more so when the twins decided to go into medicine. They seem to idolize my brother, the nut, so this new generation has pretty much picked up the baton from our fathers.
I once enjoyed the relationship between our two families until that fateful day when she was about fifteen and went from the little innocent in ponytails and braces whom I enjoyed teasing to something else entirely overnight. I saw the interest in her actions and ran hard and fast in the opposite direction.
Back then, she was too young, and when she wasn’t, I had a girlfriend who turned out to be a snake, but that’s a tale for another time. In the years since then, she’s grown older, and so have I, but I always knew the interest was there. It was hard to miss even as she got older because she wears her emotions in her eyes, at least with me.
I also know how dangerous she could be and have made it a point to steer clear of her as much as I possibly could. It was her twenty-first birthday when things really came full circle. I’ll never forget the way she looked that night, all grown up in her fancy evening gown as half the city came to celebrate her.
I remember the way she’d searched me out in the crowd, the look of longing in her eyes when they landed on mine. I knew she was remembering the conversation we’d had years earlier when she was brave enough at eighteen to tell me about her interest and the fact that I had turned her down as gently as I could.
She was still too young then, but it was the way she called me out on my disinterest that sealed the deal for me. She’s always been bold and straightforward, something I appreciate in anyone I deal with. But when she claimed to know that I was as interested as she was, I knew I had to cut all ties before things got out of hand.
I’d said some harsh things to her that night in my effort to get her to see reason. Her spoilt ass is so accustomed to getting what she wants that there was no other way to handle the situation back then. I’ve always regretted it, but there was nothing for it; what’s done is done.
Since that night, we’ve both treated each other like nemesis. For me, it was a protective measure; for her, it was anger and hurt. A hurt that I had caused, even though I hated doing it. Now we’ve both grown, and there’s nothing standing in the way, nothing except my fear of losing myself in her.
I’m no hypocrite. I know for a fact that she could be the one. That I could see myself going the distance with her. I’ve seen her face enough in my dreams to know what the hell that means. But I’m not willing to risk it because this time, if things don’t work out, it will destroy me.
JESSICA
“Pfft!”I was still stomping mad when I made my way back up the stairs after my workout and shower, only to walk into a wall of busybodies who swarmed like vultures as soon as I stepped foot into the room.
“So, you didn’t need Toby before; what changed?”
Annabelle smirked as she dug into a tub of caramel peach ice cream with her whole face. My sister: the only woman who still has pregnancy cravings months after giving birth. “Don’t start.” The rest of them were looking at me as if I were a new species that had just dropped into their midst.
I especially did not like the inquiring look on my Dad’s face, but I chose to ignore it. My ignorant brothers were doing that thing with their eyes where you know that they’re talking to each other in the head. I understand the twins’ ability to do that, but baby brother shares the same anomaly with them, which is beyond weird.
“Do you feel better, love?”
“Yes, Grandpa, thanks for asking.”
“Now, the lady before; you say she doesn’t think you’re good enough for the goombah that cheated?”
“It’s not important, Gramps; she's not important.” I walked over and kissed his cheek because his feathers were ruffled.
“Yes, but how come no one knew you were being mistreated by this minga?” Ah geez.
