Iwatch my come leak from her, teeth snapping together as I immediately want to do it again. Fuck, seeing her full of me has something inside of me rearing up, a need to be there always, to keep her filled with me. I want to mark her from every angle, from every depth.
Gently, I lower her leg to the ground and wrap an arm around her waist, keeping her upright as her spine thumps against my chest. She’s limp and damp with sweat, chest moving fast with her breaths.
I wasn’t messing around when I told her to fuck the schedule. There is no way I can do that. While this lasts, she is mine. I just haven’t told her that yet.
“You’re entirely too good at that,” she breathes, resting her weight on me.
“What were you saying?” I tease.
Her shoulders move a little on a silent laugh as she rights herself and shakes her head before she walks, completely naked through the apartment and closes the door to the bathroom. I hear the shower turn on a moment later.
I right my clothes having not even managed to get them all the way off and pull out my cell to order us food. When Sidney finally returns, skin flushed from the shower and in a fresh pair of pajamas, the Thai food is on the way, and I have a fresh glass of wine poured.
“We have a gala in three weeks,” I stretch my arm across the back of the couch, my fingers an inch away from her hair and I can’t help but reach for a strand, curling it around one of them.
“Do we?” She tucks herself into the couch, cradling her wine glass.
“Do you need me to arrange a dress fitting?”
“What’s this one for?”
“We’re raising money for the local children’s hospital, and my company is matching the donation.”
Her eyes soften, “I can wear one I already have.”
“You sure?” I tug that strand of hair once before I let it go, gesturing for my lap. She knows what to do immediately, uncurling her legs from beneath her to stretch them out and rest her feet in my lap. We’ve sat like this hundreds of times before, watched movies, talked until the early hours of the morning in this exact same position, but this time feels different. I don’t know if it’ssimply because we’ve crossed that line and going into territory that feels more intimate or because the way she is looking at me has changed. I’ve looked at this woman every day for years. I notice the subtle differences, even if she doesn’t, and that look… It’s making my heart skip a damn beat.
No one warns you of the pain of not being loved back. It’s worse than heartbreak because at least with heartbreak you had that one thing you craved, even if you lost it in the end. But loving someone who doesn’t see you the same way forces a piece of your soul to crack. Causes a fissure that continues to open; it grows, and it grows until you can’t fucking stand it.
“What’s the color scheme?” She asks, resting her head on the back of the couch as she looks at me softly, her cheeks still pink, eyes blinking lazily.
“Which one is your favorite?” My thumb presses into the soft spot below her ankle bone and gently massages.
“The gold.”
“We’ll go gold then,” I tell her. “I have the tie that matches.”
“Works for me,” she mumbles sleepily.
“No sleep for you yet,” I pat her shin, “I need to feed you first.”
She pouts in that adorable way of hers, but lifts her feet to allow me to grab the food from the door and then dish it up, making sure to give her the most of the ones she loves, and I just have whatever is left. She never notices, but then the woman barely remembers to feed herself throughout the day, and by the time dinner comes around, she’s like a starved animal.
She devours half her plate in record time, only pausing a few times to tell me about the projects she’s working on. She has a real fondness for peonies and tulips, so whenever she gets to work with them, she lights up like a kid on Christmas. This new job though, seems like it will be a lot of work. Sidney is one of the most capable people I know, smart and efficient with her work, but I also know her schedule. She’ll sooner run herself into the ground than let someone down.
I make a mental note to keep a closer eye on her. It wouldn’t be the first time I’ve had to step in to make sure she was taking care of herself, and I have no issues doing it again. She’ll be grumpy about it for a while, but she knows I only ever have her best interest at heart.
She clears up the takeout containers and our plates once we’re finished, and I can see the tiredness on her. I need to call our evening short even though this has been the highlight of my entire day.
Standing up from the couch, I stretch out my back and pluck my keys from the table.
“Are you going?” She frowns.
“Early meeting,” I lie.
“Oh,” her arms wrap around her, “Okay.”
“Text you later, okay?” I press my lips to her forehead and head to the door, my steps weighted.
